Osho ashram Pune

Posted on February 5, 2011 by nandan

I visited Pune with friends for a few hours but these few hours seemed enough to get a taste of the city. It was just like any other metropolitan Indian city but there was definitely something special about Pune. We visited an area where all the IT companies were situated and this visit was just awesome. I saw offices of all the big IT names I had ever heard of. Infosys, Wipro, TCS, Infosys, Wipro, TCS… all these huge IT companies had their offices there. The architecture also seemed completely unusual but very impressive. The buildings had strange shape but they were looking very nice. I am sure the best IT techniques were used to design those buildings.

There was construction going on everywhere in the city. Big glass window buildings were everywhere with a lot of traffic on the road which was just like any other big Indian city. After visiting the IT park we decided to visit Osho Ashram in Pune. This ashram was just hilarious. When I think about an Ashram, I think about a very simple place where a lot of religious practices are going on but this ashram was just like a five star hotel with all the rich people from all over the world living in it. There was a reception counter at the entrance where I saw one Indian and one foreigner talking in English, first shock.

When we went to him asking what was going on there and how could we go in he gave us a pamphlet explain the rules of entering in the ashram. There was an entry fee of Rs. 850 just to visit the ashram for a day. They needed everyone to have HIV test done before they come and if visitors don’t have HIV test done they get tested at the ashram before entering in. I just could not imagine why somebody would need HIV test in order to get in an ashram but then I learnt that Osho was really serious about HIV and AIDS and his approach to sex was also different.

But still I did not understand what kind of approach makes you get HIV testing done before meeting someone and then a few locals told me that it is very easy to find people to have sex with inside the ashram hence it is necessary to have HIV testing done. If this is the case then it was very smart decision to have people HIV testing done before getting in the ashram but it was really unusual. Anyways, this five start ashram offers rooms for Rs. 5000 per day. I am 100% sure that anyone can find a really luxury nice hotel room for this much of money in India but again five star ashram deserves five star money. I enjoyed talking and learning about the ashram. Hope to have enough money to stay at the ashram someday and experience a five star ashram:)

Kathmandu Gay Pride 2010

Posted on August 30, 2010 by nandan

I traveled to Nepal with my friend Babu to attend the Kathmandu Gay Pride, and it was truly an unforgettable experience. We took a bus from Varanasi to Sonauli, catching the last one at 8:30 PM. It was an overnight journey, and the bus ride was quite uncomfortable. The road was terrible, and I couldn’t sleep at all. We finally arrived at the Sonauli border at 7 AM and took a pedal rickshaw to cross. I was carrying some electronics like a video camera, photo camera, and voice recorder, and I wanted to declare them at the Indian customs office.

beautiful nature

When I told Babu about declaring the electronics, he laughed and said it wasn’t necessary. However, I had experienced issues before during my first trip to Nepal in 1996. Back then, I was traveling with my family. We had a camera, which we declared at the Sonauli border and received a receipt for. Unfortunately, we lost it while in Nepal, and on our return, customs checked our baggage, found the camera, and claimed it wasn’t allowed to bring electronics from Nepal to India.

Babu at Pashupati nath temple

We were shocked when they insisted it wasn’t our camera, despite having a receipt. The customs officers were simply looking for a bribe. We ended up giving them some money to be allowed to leave. This experience stayed in my mind, which is why I didn’t want to take any chances this time. When I approached the customs office at the Sonauli border to declare my electronics, the officers laughed and said, “You’re very smart.”

Beautiful

I declared my items and got a receipt, but they again asked for a bribe for issuing it. I questioned why they were asking for a bribe now, and one officer explained it was just the system. I offered Rs. 20, but he insisted on at least Rs. 50. In the end, I gave him Rs. 40 and received my receipt. I had hoped that by declaring my electronics in advance, I could avoid any problems or corruption, but it seemed unavoidable. After obtaining the receipt, we crossed the border into Nepal.

Wooden windows

Although Nepal had been a Hindu country until a few years ago, I expected its culture to be similar to India’s. However, there was a noticeable difference right at the border: different-looking people, clothing, more working women, and different vehicles. It felt like a completely different country. The one similarity was the presence of touts trying to exploit tourists. Many approached us immediately to sell bus tickets to Kathmandu and hotel rooms.

Temple doorways

Babu warned me that these touts often lied. They claimed a bus would leave within the hour, but Babu assured me that buses typically don’t leave before 4 PM. I was skeptical until my rickshaw driver confirmed it. There are direct buses from the Sonauli border to Kathmandu, but only in the early morning or late afternoon. Luckily, Babu was with me, and I avoided the touts. We took a bus from the Sonauli border to a place called Bhairava, which was only about a 30-minute ride.

Forest

Bhairava is the largest bus station near the Sonauli border, and there are regular buses to Kathmandu. We arrived by 9 AM and learned that a bus would leave at 9:30. I noticed something peculiar: Nepal has no government bus service, so all buses are private, with no fixed fares. I wasn’t aware I was supposed to bargain for the bus fare, but Babu handled it. The counter initially quoted us Rs. 450, but we ended up paying Rs. 350.

Greenery everywhere

The bus departed at 9:30 but was stopped 15 minutes later by the army. I thought they would check everyone, but they only looked around and inspected a few bags. Surprisingly, they weren’t just searching for weapons; they were also checking for potatoes and sugar. I laughed when Babu explained that the authorities wanted to prevent smuggling these items from India, where they are cheaper. It was interesting to learn about the trade dynamics.

pashupati nath temple

Nepali buses were cramped, with little legroom. It rained continuously from Sonauli to Kathmandu, and water even came in through the windows despite being closed. I was soaked for over 12 hours on the bus. The nature in Nepal was breathtaking—clean rivers, fresh air, and lush greenery. I noticed that there seemed to be more working women in Nepal than in India. Many shops were run by women, and they appeared to be in better circumstances than their Indian counterparts.

Signboard about family violence

Nepal appeared more progressive regarding women’s rights compared to India. Women traveled alone, worked in offices, ran shops, and even drove auto rickshaws. It was refreshing to see. I was particularly struck by the number of alcohol shops run by women—something I had never encountered in India. I met a female shop owner and struck up a conversation with her.

Nepali girl

I asked her if she felt safe managing an alcohol shop alone and dealing with often-drunk male customers. She replied that running the business was no different from how any male family member would manage it. When I inquired about societal attitudes towards women in alcohol sales, she mentioned that Nepali society is quite progressive in terms of women’s rights. She had never visited India but had seen it on TV, and she didn’t seem particularly excited about it.

liberal Nepali girl

I explained to her that it’s nearly impossible to find women selling alcohol in India and that there are fewer working women overall. She was aware of the situation and pointed out that many Indian families in Nepal restrict their women from working outside the home. When I asked what Nepali people think of this, she candidly said, “Honestly, we think Indians are crazy and backward.” I was taken aback, but it’s true that, in terms of women’s rights, India has a long way to go compared to Nepal.

the most beautiful alcohol bottle I had ever seen

An alcohol bottle

The nature throughout Nepal was stunning. It was clear that the environment remains largely untouched—thick jungles, beautiful rivers, fewer industries, less traffic, and majestic mountains. I truly enjoyed the natural beauty of Nepal. I noticed only five large factories during the entire bus ride from Sonauli to Kathmandu, and two of them were Indian factories. While this means less pollution, it also means fewer jobs, which contributes to poverty.

Luxury way to travel in Nepal

Poverty in Nepal struck me deeply. Along the Sonauli-Kathmandu highway, I saw many homes and people, but what was surprising was that many seemed to be doing nothing—just sitting around and chatting. It felt like they had no work to occupy them. I encountered numerous children selling water bottles and snacks along the road. Nepal has suffered significantly from political instability in recent years, which appears to be a major cause of its poverty. The Nepalis I spoke with seemed discontent with the political situation.

Beautiful window art

Finally, we arrived in Kathmandu around 8 PM, and it was still raining. I had read about a neighborhood called Thamel, known for its hotels, and I wanted to stay there. Babu warned me that locals often give wrong directions, so he suggested asking someone at an Indian-run shop. We found a paan shop, bought a few items, and asked for directions. Fortunately, the shopkeeper was helpful, and after about a 10-minute walk and a few inquiries, we made it to Thamel.

Cremations at Pashupati Nath temple

Thamel was bustling with hotels, making it a popular spot for backpackers. We checked several hotels, but the prices were steep. Babu said we could find a room for around 500 NR, but none offered rates below 1000 INR. Eventually, we reached Annapurna Hotel, where they wanted to charge us 800 INR per night. I mentioned I was a government-approved tour guide in India, and they agreed to give me a room for 500 INR.

To be honest I did not like it at all

The hotel initially seemed nice, but we soon discovered that the pillow covers and bed sheets were used, the cable connection didn’t work, and the telephone was dead. We complained, and they promised to fix everything by the next morning, but that morning never came before we left. I wasn’t there to enjoy luxury, watch TV, or make calls from my room, so I didn’t mind too much. We went out for dinner, but most restaurants were closed by 8:30 PM. We eventually found an open restaurant and had our meal.

I had read various articles about nightlife in Nepal, including dance bars and massage centers. Some claimed it was safe, while others warned of potential dangers. Many articles described how people would spend significant money at nightclubs and face misbehavior. I also read about underage kids involved in the sex industry. Curiosity got the better of us, and we decided to visit at least one nightclub in Kathmandu.

While walking around Thamel, I noticed numerous massage parlors. As we passed one, a boy who appeared to be about 15 approached me and asked what I was looking at. I explained I was merely checking out the advertisements. He insisted that I was interested in something special. I clarified that I wasn’t looking for anything like that. He continued to follow us, offering young, beautiful girls at low prices. There were many pimps lurking around, watching tourists.

I managed to return to my hotel safely. The next day, we worked for a while, explored, and did some shopping. I missed vegetarian Indian food,

Widows in Varanasi

Posted on December 10, 2009 by nandan

I worked with a student named Irine from the University of Venice who wanted to study widows in Varanasi, focusing specifically on the issue of prostitution among widows in widow ashrams. She explained that her interest was sparked by the film *Water*. Although I found the subject compelling, I was initially uncertain about finding widows to interview about prostitution. Nevertheless, the topic intrigued me, so I agreed to collaborate with her. I conducted some research and discovered a government-run widow ashram near my home.

Upon visiting, we found about 18 widows living at the ashram. The facility was in poor condition: while there was a garden and open space, the building itself appeared to be from the early 1900s and was not well maintained. An office staff member informed us that a wealthy pilgrim from Kolkata had once visited Varanasi, met a widow at a ghat, and was moved by her story. This encounter led him to fund the construction of the ashram, which was later handed over to the government. It is currently managed by the Department of Women Welfare for Uttar Pradesh.

This is the only government-run widow ashram in the entire state of Uttar Pradesh. The woman in charge of the office was receptive to Irine’s project and allowed us to interview the widows. The ashram is divided into two sections: one for widows who are able to care for themselves and another for those who are physically unfit. Each widow receives only Rs. 550 (US$ 12) per month from the government. We were told by both the widows and the office in charge that no government funds had been received for the past three months, leaving the widows without any financial support.

The office in charge mentioned that local donors, who regularly contribute to the ashram, are essential for the widows’ survival. Without these donations, the government stipend alone would be insufficient. It is difficult to imagine how one could survive on Rs. 550 a month. The widows who are capable of managing on their own live on the ground floor, while those who are older or in poor health reside on the first floor. The government provides each widow with a small gas stove for cooking, but they must prepare their own meals. The ashram has a kitchen where food is prepared for those who cannot cook for themselves, with the cooking done by office staff. There is also a washing machine for laundry, though I am unsure who operates it.

The rooms are spacious, with four beds in each. Irine was particularly interested in exploring the issue of prostitution among widows, but I was uncertain how to approach this sensitive topic with women who were all over 65, with some over 80. We decided to visit the ashram multiple times, building rapport with the widows and staff to see if any information might emerge. We also inquired about other widow ashrams in Varanasi and were directed to two additional locations. One was very close to my place, called Mata Anandmayi Ashram.

At Mata Anandmayi Ashram, we discovered that it primarily functions as a religious school for girls. The peon mentioned that there were over 20 widows there as well, but the manager was extremely uncooperative. He denied that they housed any widows, which was puzzling. We were unable to speak with anyone other than the rude manager and peon. We then visited Birla Ashram at Chowk, Varanasi, which was established by the Birla family. There were around 20 widows residing there, but we couldn’t speak with any of them on our first visit.

We encountered a woman who was not a widow but was staying there thanks to her IAS officer husband, who had arranged a room for her due to her religious interests. She was uncooperative and prevented us from speaking with the widows. She asked us to return after a few days as she wanted to consult someone in Kolkata first. We returned after a few days and fortunately, the woman was not present. We managed to speak with a widow, but she was busy at the time. She told us that most of the widows at Birla Ashram work as cooks in various households and that the ashram only provides them with a room.

The disparity in support and conditions between the ashrams was striking. Some widows, particularly those who were unable to work, seemed to receive little more than a place to stay. When a widow dies, the ashram informs the family; if no one comes, the body is cremated, sometimes traditionally and sometimes using an electric burner. The stories of the widows were both heartbreaking and enlightening. Many were forced to leave their homes due to harsh circumstances: some were expelled by their own children or daughters-in-law, while others chose to leave to avoid being a burden. A common thread among them was early marriage, with some married as young as 6 or 7 years old.

I met several women married at such a young age, and many lost their husbands by the time they were only 10, never having lived with them. One remarkable woman from Chennai, who was the most educated and articulate of all the widows we met, shared a particularly poignant story. Married at seven, she spent four years living with her parents before moving in with her husband at eleven, only to be separated from him for a year due to family traditions. After her husband’s death, she lived with her parents and later with her sister. Feeling like a burden, she initially came to Varanasi to commit suicide but was saved by a boat rower and sent to the ashram. Her story was deeply moving and highlighted her resilience.

She described South Indian widow traditions, which differ somewhat from North Indian practices. For instance, after a husband’s death, a South Indian widow’s head is shaved, and she is separated from others while sarees are thrown at her from a distance. In South India, widows are permitted to wear either white or red sarees, whereas in North India, only white is allowed. The practice of throwing sarees is not something I have heard of in North India, but considering the conditions faced by widows, it’s not entirely inconceivable.

When we asked all the widows why someone becomes a widow, they all agreed with the belief that it is due to some sin from their past life. However, they felt that the sins of widowers are not as severe. Widows are expected to follow stringent rules, such as abstaining from tasty food, not interacting with men, not going out, not wearing colorful clothes, and avoiding celebrations. Most widows believed these restrictions were necessary to atone for their sins and avoid punishment in the afterlife.

Regarding remarriage, only a few widows felt it was acceptable; most viewed contemporary widows who remarry or dress in colorful clothes negatively. The general sentiment was that widows should adhere strictly to traditional practices. The prevailing view among the widows was that they were marginalized and discriminated against, particularly in Varanasi. They are often excluded from weddings and considered bad luck. It is disheartening to see such practices, which seem disconnected from the core values of Hinduism, which I believe should emphasize equality and respect for all individuals.

This experience has taught me a great deal. The systemic issues and historical practices that have contributed to the plight of women in India are profound. While education is crucial for addressing these problems, the current state of educational and social reform suggests that change may be slow. It is clear that addressing these deep-seated issues requires not only better education but also comprehensive social and policy reforms.

Tawayaf culture

Posted on October 15, 2009 by nandan

I am currently hosting a Fulbright scholar named Megan, who is conducting research for the University of Pittsburgh. Her research focuses on the tawayaf culture. She has rented an entire flat and will be staying with us until June 2010. We have discussed various aspects of tawayaf culture in Varanasi. While I was aware that Lucknow was the most renowned center for tawayafs, Megan mentioned that the tawayaf culture in Varanasi has virtually disappeared. However, after speaking with a few friends and relatives, I learned that there are still some places where tawayafs perform.

Many people mistakenly believe that tawayafs were merely prostitutes, but this is far from the truth. Tawayafs were highly educated women, trained in various skills such as dancing, singing, and literature, and were well-respected in society. My friend Ravi told me that children from royal families were sent to tawayafs for training in behavior, ghazal writing, and other skills. The residence of tawayafs was known as a “kotha,” which is now commonly misinterpreted as a brothel, but this is not accurate. Kothas were actually places where tawayafs lived and performed.

Typically, a kotha would house multiple tawayafs, with one senior tawayaf serving as the head. The head was responsible for training the other tawayafs. Kothas often hosted dance performances every evening that were open to the public. They employed male musicians who played various instruments, while the tawayafs performed dances. Alcohol was served to special clients or occasionally to all attendees. While sex work was also part of the kotha’s activities, it was not comparable to today’s brothels where one can pay a minimal amount for sexual services.

Tawayafs were expensive, and it is said that they had the right to choose their clients. They usually had one special client with whom they maintained a significant relationship, which was quite different from the typical sex work-client relationship. Tawayafs also had children, and this special client often acted as a father figure to the children. Tawayafs were invited to perform at palaces and entertain royal families. From what I have learned, tawayafs were accepted and respected in society, although kothas themselves were still viewed with disdain.

Information about tawayafs is limited, but I have heard that there are still a few kothas operating illegally in Varanasi and Lucknow. Megan’s research on tawayafs is fascinating, but she has expressed a growing interest in studying modern sex workers due to the limited information available on tawayafs. I am eager to learn more about tawayafs and look forward to seeing what insights Megan’s thesis might offer.

—

Sex worker children rights rally

Posted on March 20, 2009 by nandan

I participated in a rally organized by Durbar to advocate for the rights of children of sex workers. The rally began at Durbar’s office in Sonagachi, a well-known red-light district. Seranna, the rest of the crew, and I arrived at the office around 6:30 in the evening. The rally was scheduled to start at 7:00, and we were all very excited. Upon arriving, I noticed hundreds of policemen stationed around the office. At first, I was concerned, but it turned out they were there to ensure our safety. By that time, about 3,000 people were already gathered, most of them children of sex workers. They were lined up and holding various banners, ready for the event.

There were also many Hijras and transgender individuals present. A group of children of sex workers was set to lead the rally with music and dance, which I found to be a fantastic addition. The rally kicked off around 7 o’clock, and by then, there were approximately 5,000 people in attendance, making it a massive event. Starting from Durbar’s office, the rally meandered through the narrow alleys of Sonagachi, the largest red-light district in India. Seranna and I were at the front, enthusiastically cheering alongside the children of sex workers.

Just a few minutes into the march, we reached the heart of the red-light district. Sex workers were visible everywhere—on the streets, on the rooftops of brothels, and peering out from their windows. Despite being well-dressed, their unhappiness and ill health were palpable. None of them wanted their pictures taken; they would immediately turn away upon seeing a camera. This reaction was disheartening and underscored their fear of exposure, which is a direct result of their marginalization and separation from society. It was a reality I hadn’t fully anticipated.

I also took a look inside some of the brothels, and what I saw was hard to believe. The conditions were appalling—filthy beyond imagination, with no proper ventilation and bottles of alcohol scattered everywhere. The grim state wasn’t limited to just the brothels; the entire neighborhood was in a state of severe disarray. Many of the people I saw appeared to be drug users, visibly suffering from physical and mental ailments. It felt like a scene from a third-world country. Although I was aware that Indian sex workers face harsh conditions, I had no idea it was this dire. I had previously seen some brothels in Varanasi and nearby districts, but this experience made me realize just how extreme the situation can be.

Children of sex workers

The conditions in the brothels are deplorable: there is no proper ventilation, inadequate food, and no access to healthcare. The workers are confined to the brothels and, despite these harsh conditions, they barely make a decent living. In India, sex work is extremely undervalued. Some of the sex workers I interviewed for the documentary revealed that they sometimes charge as little as Rs. 50 per customer, from which they have to give half to the brothel owner. It was a grim situation. We handed out many pamphlets detailing the rights of sex workers and their children, but I couldn’t understand the content as it was all written in Bengali.

Children carrying banners

One intriguing observation was the prevalence of effeminate behavior among the children of sex workers in the cultural program and parade. Many of them identified as hijras or exhibited effeminate mannerisms. They would sometimes sing hijra songs. I had heard from sex workers and locals in Kolkata that children of sex workers are often abused by their mothers’ clients, which might explain their effeminate tendencies. While I’m unsure of the exact reasons, such a large concentration of hijras and effeminate individuals from one neighborhood is unusual in my society.

Women hiding their face from camera

Many locals in Kolkata informed me that some clients visit brothels and request young children. The brothel owners exploit this demand by forcing the children of sex workers, sometimes as young as 6 or 7, into sexual acts. This often happens without the mothers’ knowledge or consent. Even if they find out, they are powerless to stop it. The children are repeatedly subjected to sexual abuse whenever a client requests a young child. It’s heartbreaking to learn about the exploitation of sex workers and their children.

Participants at the rally

Some people suggested that because the children of sex workers spend most of their time with their mothers, are isolated from male influences, and are often abused, it can affect their development and lead to effeminacy. I can’t say for certain if this is true, but it might be partially accurate. Despite these challenges, the children were wonderful with their dancing and music, and some of them played the drums as well. Midway through the rally, we were joined by the renowned hijra activist Laxmi Narayan Tripathi, who is well-known for representing hijras and transgender individuals across Asia.

Some more banners

She was brimming with energy and enthusiasm for the rally. She jumped, clapped, danced, and shouted with such fervor—it was incredibly fun to watch. I thoroughly enjoyed being part of it. I joined in the dancing and tried my best to sing along to their Bengali songs, though I struggled with the pronunciation. I especially enjoyed when they sang the Hindi song “Hum Honge Kamyab” (We Will Be Successful), and I sang along with them. It was a truly amazing experience to be with these children fighting for their rights. Eventually, we reached a large park where the parade concluded. Various speakers took the stage to share their thoughts and address the community.

Participants at the rally

A few sex workers, social activists, and Laxmi addressed the crowd. They vowed to continue fighting for their rights with unwavering determination. The rally concluded, and we had caused a significant traffic jam. I thoroughly enjoyed the event, from the spirited participation of the sex workers’ children to the overall atmosphere of the rally. I am certain that I will return next year to support them again.

Laxmi Narayan Tripathi addressing the rally

Condom usage demonstration & training to the sex workers

Posted on March 10, 2009 by nandan

Seranna and I accomplished something unprecedented in India. On the final day of the conference, we conducted a condom usage demonstration in front of a crowd of 6,000 to 7,000 people. We provided training to sex workers on how to protect themselves from sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) and also shared strategies for improving their earnings. Through our interviews with sex workers, we discovered that their knowledge of STDs was limited, with HIV being the most commonly recognized. To address this gap, I asked Seranna to include information about various STDs in her presentation. Given that she was scheduled to speak on the last day of the conference, we saw it as a prime opportunity to reach a large audience and spread vital health information effectively.

Seranna and I on the stage, I was really confused:)

Seranna was deeply moved by the extreme poverty faced by Indian sex workers. She contrasted it with the situation in the West, where sex workers often earn significantly more. For example, she mentioned that in the West, she charges $300 per hour—an amount that represents two to three months’ salary for an Indian sex worker. Seranna was eager to share her insights on how sex workers could potentially increase their earnings from clients. Although reaching that level of income might take time for Indian sex workers, she believed that providing them with this knowledge could be beneficial. On the final day of the conference, which was attended by around 6,000 to 7,000 people, the majority of whom were sex workers, Seranna’s presentation was a valuable opportunity to impart this information and inspire change.

Me acting as a doggy customer

Since we only finalized the details of Seranna’s presentation on the morning of the event, we were under significant time constraints. With just a few hours to prepare, we decided to make the presentation more engaging by incorporating a skit. I had requested that Seranna bring some sex toys for the demonstration, and she brought three dildos. Seranna was enthusiastic about using them to illustrate key points in the presentation. However, I was concerned about using sex toys in front of such a large audience, especially given that they are illegal in India. This added an extra layer of anxiety about how the presentation might be received and whether it could cause any issues.

I had no idea what was going on

I asked Seranna to check with the conference organizer about using sex toys in our presentation. The organizer gave us the green light, but I was still apprehensive about displaying them in front of such a large audience. I approached the organizer myself for a second opinion, and he reassured me that it was fine. Seranna and I then discussed our approach for the presentation. We agreed that it should be engaging and not just a lecture. We decided to incorporate some comedy, as Seranna often does, to keep the audience entertained. The next challenge was that the audience primarily spoke Bengali, so we needed a translator to convert our presentation from English to Bengali.

I laugh every time I see this photo 🙂

We asked the organizer for a translator, and they provided us with a Bengali-English interpreter. For our presentation, I took on the role of a difficult customer who refused to pay upfront and insisted on not using condoms, while Seranna portrayed a savvy sex worker. To emphasize my role, I wore a mask shaped like male genitalia. The presentation began with Seranna requesting payment upfront, but I, in character, insisted on receiving services before paying. This led to a heated exchange, with Seranna repeatedly asserting that she required payment before providing her services, while I countered by arguing that I should pay only after receiving them. Ultimately, Seranna refused to provide the services, illustrating the importance of securing payment in advance.

Some toys we used in the presentation

Then, I agreed to pay upfront. Through this, we aimed to emphasize to the other sex workers the importance of securing payment before providing services, as some clients might not pay after receiving them. Afterward, Seranna introduced the dildo, which caused a hushed silence in the audience. I felt quite uncomfortable, but hoped it would be beneficial for everyone at the conference. Seranna demonstrated how to use the dildo, showing a technique to ensure that clients’ genitalia are disease-free before providing services. She emphasized that this practice could help protect sex workers from potential health risks.

After this, Seranna instructed me to use a condom, but I continued to resist, playing the role of a reluctant client who didn’t want to use one. I argued that since I was married and she looked safe, there was no need for protection. Seranna countered by pointing out that diseases aren’t visible on the face, emphasizing the importance of using condoms to prevent STDs, including HIV/AIDS. Eventually, I agreed to use the condom. Following this, Seranna demonstrated how to enhance the client experience by having me lay on my stomach on the bench for a massage and then performing a “boob slide.” The goal of this demonstration was to educate sex workers on how to engage more effectively with clients, offering additional services that could lead to higher satisfaction, better tips, and increased earnings.

Seranna demonstrated proper condom usage by placing it over the dildo. The dildo was large, requiring her to try twice. She added a humorous touch by commenting on the dildo’s size, which caused the previously silent audience to laugh and applaud. After successfully placing the condom, Seranna performed a demonstration of oral sex. We had several toys representing different sexually transmitted diseases. Seranna would simulate oral sex and then display the toys, explaining how they are spread and their potential consequences. I appreciated her clear and informative explanations about these diseases.

And then she acted like we were having sex and she would ask me if I was enjoying it. This was also one very important part of this training to tell sex workers to keep talking to their clients about how they feel while having sex. This way the men become more erected and cum early (I believe in the idea of working smart, not hard). So good for sex workers. By this time our time and bench’s life was finished. It broke and we fell down on the ground and this brought dead silence amongst the audience. But finally everyone started making noise, laughing and clapping. I loved it.

Finally, I gave Seranna a tip for her exceptional performance. I believe that introducing such innovative approaches to sex work could significantly improve the lives of Indian sex workers. Indian men would likely appreciate these services, but it’s unclear why such practices are not more common among local sex workers. I hope this presentation helps them earn more and make positive changes in their lives. Immediately after the presentation, we were surrounded by media, social workers, sex workers, and other attendees, all eager to speak with us and conduct interviews. It was a fantastic experience. We’re considering doing something similar in the US next June.

Interview with sex workers

Posted on March 8, 2009 by nandan

We interviewed several sex workers in Kolkata for the documentary, and I was fortunate to serve as the interpreter between them and Seranna, which allowed me to speak with them personally. One notable observation was that many of the sex workers we spoke with had entered the profession after experiencing significant hardships in their lives. For example, I spoke with a sex worker originally from Faizabad, now residing in Kolkata. She shared that she had married a Muslim man against her family’s wishes, leading her to leave her home and move to Kolkata.

After spending a few months in Kolkata, she discovered that her husband was a drug user. Despite her repeated pleas for him to quit drugs and find a job, he refused to change. When she had a child, their financial situation became dire, as her husband was unemployed and she couldn’t seek help from her family due to the conflict caused by her interfaith marriage. Faced with these challenges, she decided to leave her home and turn to sex work at a brothel. She is now happy with her life, feeling that it is better than what her husband could provide.

She enjoys a newfound independence and freedom, and has even rebuilt her relationship with her family. Initially, there were issues when her family learned she had become a sex worker, but those conflicts have since been resolved. Notably, she worked as a program coordinator for Durbar, the sex workers’ organization. Her role brought her into the public eye, and when her neighbors from her hometown saw her on TV discussing sex work, they began inquiring about her parents. Her parents urged her to leave the profession, but she is resolute in her decision to remain a sex worker. She is very content with her life and even hopes to continue in this profession in her next life.

When asked about her wishes for her child, she expressed a desire for them to attend school and secure a stable job. However, a significant challenge for sex workers is getting their children admitted to school. Most sex workers in India lack residential proof, as many are brought from countries like Nepal or Bangladesh, or they frequently change their residences. Because many sex workers come from other countries, or even if they are from within India, they often lack residential proof. This is due to frequent changes in their place of residence or the controlling nature of brothel owners.

Typically, sex workers are not permitted to leave the brothel area. While some may work at hotels, this opportunity is limited. Brothel owners usually only send those who have been with them for several years, as these workers are considered less likely to run away. In some cases, brothel owners also send someone along with the sex workers when they go to hotels to ensure they remain under control. Another major issue for sex workers is the low income they earn from their profession. In India, sex work is very inexpensive, and sex workers often lack social identity and security.

Typically, they charge between Rs. 50-100 per client, as sex work is usually brief—clients often engage in sex for just 5-10 minutes and then leave. Sometimes, they do not even see the face of the person they are with. Both sex workers and clients prefer to keep their identities hidden, which contributes to the clandestine nature of the work. Sometimes, sex workers spend up to an hour with a single client, earning around Rs. 500 for that session. However, this is not the norm. Typically, they see numerous clients each day, often making only Rs. 50 per client after giving half of their earnings to the brothel owner.

Though they might have a few regular clients who are more generous and even book overnight sessions, these opportunities are rare. The majority of their income is minimal, forcing them to see more than ten clients daily, which takes a significant physical and emotional toll on them. Due to the lack of residential proof, sex workers struggle to open bank accounts or access services that require identity verification. In India, stringent checks for residential documents have become more common since the Mumbai bomb blasts, exacerbating the difficulties faced by sex workers. If they are caught without proper documentation, they risk being sent to jail.

Many sex workers reported that police raids are frequent, during which they are often beaten, abused, or imprisoned. Ironically, the same officers who conduct these raids sometimes return the following day to solicit sexual services from them. The sex workers explained that brothel owners typically pay local police stations a bribe each month to avoid raids. Despite this, the police still conduct raids when there is political pressure or an opportunity for personal gain. Some sex workers recounted disturbing experiences where police officers took them to jail and sexually assaulted them there. It was deeply shocking to hear how those meant to uphold the law were instead violating it.

They also mentioned that, in some cases, the police have even targeted the children of sex workers, which was particularly horrifying and hard to believe. When we asked sex workers about their services, most said they do not perform oral sex or offer massages to their clients. Only one woman admitted to giving oral sex, but only to select clients. In India, discussing oral sex is taboo, and it is often not mentioned by sex workers. This reluctance is surprising, as providing such services could potentially increase their earnings. The reasons for this silence are unclear, but some believe it is considered an “English style” of sex, though it may have historical roots in India. It’s possible that this practice was introduced by the British and then spread globally.

One of the sex workers shared a story from the early days of Durbar’s efforts to provide basic literacy and education. Durbar sought to rent a room from the local community to start their classes. Despite their best efforts, which included approaching nearly everyone in the neighborhood over a two-month period, no one agreed to rent them a space. Many residents questioned Durbar’s motives, arguing that educating sex workers would lead them to disrespect others and make their own decisions. As a result, Durbar had to set up the classes at their own office, which was about a kilometer away from the brothels.

Another interesting observation was that many sex workers have a regular client who holds a special place in their lives. This client is not merely a customer but acts like a life partner, often providing support for the sex worker’s children. One significant challenge for sex workers is getting their children admitted to school, as they are required to provide the name of the child’s father. Since this can be difficult due to their circumstances, some of these special clients step in and provide their name as the father, helping the sex workers with the admission process.

We also inquired about sexually transmitted diseases, and, frankly, most sex workers were only aware of HIV. They knew about lubricants but had limited knowledge beyond that. Despite using condoms, they reported frequent breakage, which they attributed mainly to poor-quality condoms. I believe that using lubricant could help prevent such issues. Before meeting Lane, I had never seen lubricant myself, and I’m puzzled as to why it’s not readily available in our market. The sex workers clearly need more comprehensive training and education on sexual health, but unfortunately, the government is doing little to address these needs.

All the sex workers we spoke to expressed a strong belief that sex work should be decriminalized, a sentiment I share. I consider sex work to be one of the world’s oldest professions, possibly even the oldest, alongside agriculture. Legalizing and decriminalizing it is crucial, as sex workers are an integral part of society and deserve the same respect as anyone else. Unfortunately, achieving this change in India will likely be a prolonged struggle, given the current state of our politics. Often, when one political faction attempts to make progress on this issue, others obstruct their efforts. Despite these challenges, organizations like Durbar are making commendable strides, and I remain hopeful for meaningful change in the future.

Comparing Countries Compassion

Posted on March 5, 2009 by nandan

Seranna has launched a documentary series titled *Comparing Countries: Compassion in Kolkata*, focusing on sex work and the lives of sex workers in India. This project is part of a broader initiative where she plans to explore these issues in various countries, but she chose to start in India. I’ve been selected to assist her in organizing interviews and will also be interviewed about my work with Sanjeevani Booti. Seranna hired a camera crew from Delhi for the project, but unfortunately, they have not been up to par. The crew, especially the cameraman, has been problematic—frequently engaging in disputes with each other in front of the interviewees. Their unprofessional behavior extends to asking inappropriate questions during interviews. Seranna has been visibly frustrated, but there’s little we can do, as the production company, though prominent and helmed by an award-winning director, does not have the director present for this project.

This documentary, *Comparing Countries: Compassion in Kolkata*, focuses on the legal landscapes surrounding sex work in different countries. I am thrilled to be involved in such a meaningful project. My role includes contributing ideas on direction and handling translations. I’ve translated several interviews with sex workers, social activists, university professors, transgender individuals, and children of sex workers. The project has been incredibly rewarding. We conducted a condom usage demonstration and provided training for sex workers on maintaining their safety and maximizing their earnings. I’m confident that this documentary will be a significant success. I feel fortunate to be part of this impactful work.

Seranna interviewing Laxmi Narayan Tripathi

Documentary filming about Indian Sex Workers

Posted on February 24, 2009 by nandan

I met Seranna today at her hotel and talked with her for about two hours. We discussed how the shooting went the previous day. She mentioned that they were supposed to film the sex workers at G.B. Road but couldn’t because the sex workers and brothel owner didn’t allow it. She simply talked with them, but she didn’t understand much of what they were saying due to the crew’s poor translation skills. They spoke to the sex workers, but often didn’t translate. She said it was okay and she was satisfied with what she was getting.

Seranna explained that the brothel owner charged her Rs. 20,000 ($450) just to let them in and organize a ten-minute dance performance by sex workers. They weren’t allowed to film the dance or anything inside the brothels. Despite this, she was still happy with the outcome. I’m sure she’s a very cool and positive person. I see this as a mistake on the part of the crew members. When I worked for CBC and MTV Italy, we conducted research beforehand, ensuring everything was well-organized. But with this documentary, nothing is organized. I didn’t like it at all.

Seranna said that after spending a few minutes at the brothel, the police arrived, demanding a bribe from her. I don’t know why they wanted a bribe, perhaps because Seranna didn’t have legal permission to make a documentary that would be commercialized. I’m sure the crew members didn’t inform her about this either. The cameraman is a very famous guy, but I don’t understand how these people can make such big mistakes. Seranna said that everything went well with her and she was very happy with the progress.

I had asked Seranna to bring some sex toys, and she brought a lot of dildos and fake vaginas. She’ll give a few of them to me for my NGO. I had never seen them before, so I was excited to check them out. She showed me how to use one of the fake vaginas. It was hilarious. She said she uses these toys to educate people about safe sex practices. I believe that these kinds of things attract attention and allow you to make people listen to what you want them to hear. I liked the toys a lot.

Seranna mentioned that the crew members didn’t want me to join the shooting for whatever reason, but Seranna wanted me to go today, but I declined. Seranna is going to interview two high-class sex workers, a politician, and attend a conference organized by Delhi University about sex work in India. We’ll fly to Kolkata tomorrow to attend the conference. I’m excited for it

Tawayaf culture in Varanasi

Posted on August 8, 2008 by nandan

An anthropology student from the University of Pittsburgh, USA, named Megan contacted me recently. She was referred by my friend Adam Sergent, an anthropology student from the University of Chicago, who had stayed at my guest house a month ago while learning Hindi in Varanasi. Megan is currently in her fourth year of research, focusing on Tawayaf culture, sex work, and HIV. Adam had mentioned my NGO to her, and she was interested in learning about my experiences working with these issues. I was intrigued by her interest in Tawayaf culture; while I had some knowledge about them, I hadn’t delved deeply into their world before.

This has sparked my curiosity, and I plan to research more about them. Megan mentioned that she was already collaborating with an NGO in Varanasi that works with sex workers but wanted to expand her contacts to other cities as well. I provided her with information about a few NGOs in Azamgarh and Mau that I am familiar with. She also requested a written document confirming her work with sex workers, Tawayafs, and HIV in Varanasi, which she needs to secure funding from her university. I will consult with my legal advisor to see if I can assist her with this request.

We had an extensive discussion about our respective experiences, and we’ve agreed to collaborate in the future. I’m looking forward to working together and supporting her important research.

Pragyabodh

Media, Research, Journalism, Tourism, Anthropology, Philosophy

Tag Archives: sex industry