First Kiwi guest at home

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About three months ago, a 55-year-old man from Auckland contacted me through Couchsurfing. He wanted information about Varanasi and expressed a desire to travel with someone. He even asked if I would be interested in being his tour guide for all of India. I was thrilled and immediately agreed to the offer. However, he later informed me that he had found many hosts in India, so he canceled his plan to hire me as his tour guide. We stayed in touch online over the next few months, and he finally arrived in Varanasi on the 6th.

I went to meet him at his hotel, where he gave me an iPod and a coat as gifts. He was interested in experiencing general Indian life, so he wanted to stay at my place. However, since he had already booked the hotel for two nights, he planned to come to my home after that. During Navratri, I took him on a tour of Varanasi. My friends and I usually visit the pandals during the night, so I took Chris along. We spent the whole night exploring and returned home around 3 a.m.

After his two-night hotel stay, Chris came to stay at my place. He was interested in visiting a local church to buy old vestments and other items used by churches in Varanasi. We went to the cantonment church, which is only 15 years old. Chris wanted to meet the bishop, but he was not in Varanasi. Instead, we met his assistant, who informed us that they did not have any old items. He suggested churches in Mumbai, Goa, and South India as alternatives.

Chris stayed with me for 15 days, though he originally planned to stay only 10. He had to extend his stay because he fell ill. He mentioned that he had eaten a samosa from a street vendor and became very sick, suffering from diarrhea, vomiting, and headaches. I took him to a doctor, but his condition did not improve, so he requested to be admitted to a hospital. I took him to Heritage Hospital, where the doctors said it was not an emergency case and did not want to admit him. However, Chris insisted on staying.

The hospital charged Rs. 15,000 (about US $400) for the services. I was shocked at the high cost for treating diarrhea. Chris was admitted to a special ward for two days. The charges included Rs. 3,500 per day for the room, Rs. 600 for the doctor’s visit, and various other fees that seemed arbitrary. Although I had heard about the $100 handshake in US hospitals, I was surprised to find a similar system in my own town. I asked Lane about it, and he noted that it was still cheaper than Western hospitals.

One interesting aspect was that everyone in the hospital was eager to know if Chris had health insurance. When I asked the doctor why this was important, he explained that foreigners usually have insurance, and the hospital charges them extra if they do. This practice seemed illegal to me, but it was conducted openly, like many other illicit activities in India. They were not even embarrassed to admit it.

After two days, Chris was eager to leave. He complained that the nurses neglected him, didn’t change his drip, failed to provide medicine, and didn’t offer food. I spoke with the doctor, who insisted that Chris stay for at least two more days. However, Chris was determined to leave, so the doctor agreed to discharge him with a few medicines. Chris was relieved to return home and left for Mumbai on the 24th.

Pittsburgh girl studies Hindi

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A girl named Abbie from Pittsburgh reached out to me through Couchsurfing, inquiring about Hindi classes in Varanasi. I recommended she contact Mr. Virendra Singh. Although she had previously written to Bhasha Bharti, she hadn’t received a response. I asked Mr. Singh if he had availability for another student, and fortunately, he had an hour free. At the time, Abbie was still in Bhopal, so I advised her to get in touch with me once she arrived in Varanasi. I also thought it would be beneficial for her to meet Udo, another Hindi student staying at my place.

Abbie called me on the 21st. I invited her to my home to introduce her to Udo, but he was out at the time. Instead, I took her to Mr. Singh’s place. After meeting him, Abbie decided she would like to continue her Hindi studies with him for the rest of her time in India. Although she had already studied Hindi for three months in Indore, she felt she hadn’t learned much because her teacher there was a mathematics teacher, not a qualified Hindi instructor.

After her initial lesson with Mr. Singh, Abbie traveled to Khajuraho but plans to return by next Monday. With three months left in India, she has ample time to learn basic Hindi. I hope she makes good progress with Mr. Singh. Although she had hoped to stay at my place, I was unable to host her as all my rooms were already booked. Instead, she is staying at Ganga Yogi Lodge near Sonarpura, which fits her budget.

Udo from Germany learns some Hindi

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I have been hosting a German student named Udo, who is 58 years old and eager to learn Hindi in Varanasi. Uncle Udo reached out to me about a month ago after finding my email address through my Hospitality Club profile. He used to be a professor of German and has worked at various universities in England, Germany, and Japan. Currently, he owns a language school in Munich but does not teach there. Instead, he assesses unemployed individuals for government assistance.

When I asked Uncle Udo why he wanted to learn Hindi at his age, he shared an interesting story. A few years ago, a friend had given him a Hindi grammar book as a birthday gift, which he had never looked at. While cleaning his cupboard a couple of years back, he rediscovered the book and decided it was time to learn Hindi. He believes that starting something new is a great way to keep the mind active in old age, and I found this idea quite inspiring. Uncle Udo had already been studying Hindi online for three years and was familiar with the sounds and grammar.

When Udo asked me about Hindi classes in Varanasi, I recommended Professor Virendra Singh. At that time, Mr. Singh was not in Varanasi but was expected to return by the first week of October. I advised Udo to continue researching alternative Hindi teachers in case Mr. Singh did not return on time. Udo mentioned Mr. Binit Mishra, whom he found online, and who was reportedly located near my home, though I had never heard of him.

Udo arrived at my home on October 6th. On his first day, we went to meet Virendra Singh, who had indeed returned to Varanasi and resumed teaching. Mr. Singh agreed to teach Udo for one hour each day, which delighted him. Given Udo’s background as a professor, he wanted a qualified instructor, which was why he had not considered other schools in Varanasi.

Since starting his lessons with Mr. Singh, Udo has been very pleased with the instruction he’s received. He regards Mr. Singh as the best Hindi professor he has ever met. Although his Hindi is not perfect, he has made significant progress and his proficiency is far beyond what most people achieve after just two weeks of classes. Udo plans to visit Khajuraho and Gwalior before leaving India in ten days. He hopes to return to Varanasi next year to continue his Hindi studies and to experience festivals like Shivratri and Holi.

Guide Association forbids new guides

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There is a new issue with the tour guide training program that was scheduled to start on October 6th. The Guide Association of Jaipur has sued the government, arguing that the training program should be extended to four months, as it was for previous guides. They are unhappy with the new structure, which includes 45 days of classes, a 15-day orientation tour, and the submission of an assignment report. They believe the program should be the same as it was before, with continuous classes for four months.

Although the current program is designed to last for four months in total, the changes from the previous format have led to dissatisfaction among the old guides. They are concerned that the new structure, which includes additional requirements, will affect their established routines. The court has now ordered the government to halt the training program until further notice.

I believe the revised program is actually an improvement over the previous one. However, it seems that the old guides are resistant to change, possibly because they fear competition from newer entrants into the industry. Despite the shortage of professional tour guides in India and the upcoming Commonwealth Games in 2010, these seasoned guides appear to be delaying the program to protect their positions. I’ve observed some guides who, rather than actively engaging with clients, have been inattentive or relied on escorts to interact with clients.

The current training program is crucial preparation for the Commonwealth Games, and with limited time available, I hope the government will address these issues promptly. Once the situation is resolved, the old guides will need to enhance their skills, or they may face being sidelined as the industry evolves.

Terrorism in India

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Yesterday was the last day of Durga Puja, and I went out with my friends to visit the Durga pandals, as we have been doing for the past decade. We typically leave home around 9 PM and spend the whole night traveling to different pandals, returning by morning. The traffic is usually heavy due to the large number of people attending, and we normally park our bikes and walk from one pandal to another.

This year, however, I was taken aback by the turnout. Only about ten percent of the usual crowd attended, a stark contrast to the vibrant celebrations of previous years. The streets, which are normally congested, were relatively empty, making it easy to ride our bikes. My friends and I were prepared for the usual foot traffic, but there was no need to walk extensively. I believe the reduced attendance was due to the recent bomb blasts in various cities and the ongoing reports about terrorism in Varanasi.

It felt disheartening to see that fear seemed to have overshadowed the festive spirit. I recall the aftermath of the bomb blast at Sankat Mochan temple, where over a hundred people died. Despite the tragedy, the community quickly returned to normal, expressing their resolve to combat terrorism with support from the authorities. However, this year’s low turnout at Durga Puja suggests that the same resolve might be fading.

This situation reminds me of a recent incident when Jaipur police arrested a mullah in Varanasi, suspecting him of involvement in the Jaipur bomb blasts. The arrest sparked significant protests from the Muslim community, leading to his release due to political pressure and concerns over vote banks. Even though he remains a suspect, he is now free and continues his activities.

Similarly, Afzal Guru, who was convicted for the terrorist attack on the Indian Parliament, was sentenced to death by the Supreme Court. However, the Central Government, led by Congress, has stalled the execution by petitioning the President, who is a Congress candidate. Reports suggest that many terrorists, including those in jail, live under relatively favorable conditions due to political and police corruption.

Sometimes I wonder if individuals like Afzal Guru and the mullah who was released under political pressure are involved in orchestrating bomb blasts. Political parties often prioritize maintaining support from influential vote banks, such as the Muslim community, over addressing terrorism effectively. The current state of affairs makes it seem like meaningful change is unlikely to come anytime soon.

Gwalior for tour guide training

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On the 27th, I traveled to Gwalior for counseling regarding the tour guide training program. My train was delayed by two hours, so I arrived at 10:30 AM, giving me nearly four hours before the counseling session was scheduled to start at 3 PM. I had heard a lot about the Gwalior Fort, so I decided to explore it. I took an auto rickshaw to the fort and reached by 11:00 AM. Gwalior Fort is massive and unlike any fort I’ve seen before. Perched 300 feet atop a hill, it features a nearly 2-kilometer-long inclined road leading to its entrance.

Within the fort, I visited the Mansingh Palace, the Sas-Bahu Temple, the Sikh Gurudwara, and the Teli Temple. Despite having three hours to explore, I quickly realized that the fort was far too vast to see everything in that time. I tried to find a guidebook or some information about the fort, but there were no tourist resources available. The ticket counter at the entrance listed a ticket price of twenty paise, a denomination that hasn’t been used for years, suggesting that updates were long overdue. The only refreshment option was a single coffee shop.

I had hoped to catch the evening sound and light show but didn’t have enough time. I particularly enjoyed the Sas-Bahu Temple, which was adorned with intricate carvings that are around 500 years old. While at the fort, a group of young Sikh men approached me for a photo. Afterward, one of the youngest, who looked about thirteen or fourteen, advised me to wake up early. I was taken aback as he seemed to know about my nocturnal habits. He then began to ask for money, starting at fifty rupees and eventually reducing his demand to just two rupees, but I didn’t give him any.

Following the Sas-Bahu Temple, I visited the Man Singh Palace, built by Raja Man Singh Tomar in 1508. The palace was later captured by the Mughals and used as a special jail for important prisoners. It was the only palace I’d seen with colorful tiles on its walls, adding to its unique beauty. I was approached by several people offering to guide me, but with only thirty minutes left, I decided against it. In retrospect, a guide might have been helpful as the palace was quite complex, reminiscent of Lucknow’s Bada Imambada.

I then proceeded to the counseling center, where I was surprised to see many attendees over the age of thirty-five, some even over fifty. Initially, I thought they might be parents of the students, but they were actually individuals who had passed the exam. It seems these experienced guides were seeking licenses to formalize their status, as they frequently face challenges from government guides and ASI officers. The institute was impressive, featuring a computer lab, library, auditorium, and well-maintained grounds, all air-conditioned. The counseling was divided into two parts: document verification and registration.

I first had to get my documents verified in a separate room where three employees checked my certificates and their attested copies. After this, I filled out a form with details like my name, roll number, marks, batch preferences, and center. I had hoped to join the New Delhi center for the second batch, but it was fully booked, so I was assigned to the Gwalior center instead. The training fee was Rs. 2000, covering the library, computer lab, and teaching costs. The training will start on January 5th and last for 45 days, followed by a week-long tour.

Afterward, I’ll be assigned a city or tourist region to research and write a report on, which must be completed within ten weeks. An exam and interview will follow, and upon passing, a tour guide license will be issued. By 5 PM, with my train back to Benares at 8:40 PM, I left the institute and walked to the railway station, which was about 5 kilometers away. Walking allowed me to see more of Gwalior, a city that, while smaller than Benares, appeared more organized with better traffic, housing, and greenery. On the train, I met a fellow Benares resident who had also qualified for the exam.

He had been working with Japanese tourists but was unhappy due to their perceived lack of generosity. Now that he would have a license, he planned to work with tourists from wealthier countries like the US or Britain. He mentioned that many Japanese-speaking guides in Delhi can’t read or write Japanese, having learned the language through conversation. However, future exams will be conducted in various languages, which might address this issue. Overall, the trip to Gwalior was short but productive. I completed the counseling process, explored the fort, and had a pleasant walk around the city. I’m looking forward to my training period in Gwalior.

Negotiation of dowry

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It was the first time in my life that I heard a family discussing their son’s marriage in such a transactional manner. My neighbor, whose son lives in Delhi after completing his 12th grade studies, is keen to get him married soon. The groom’s mother and grandmother visited our home to inquire if there were any suitable girls in our family. They spoke with my mother about the marriage, and my mother knew a few families looking to marry off their daughters.

The groom is only 26 years old and still a student, pursuing a computer degree. They requested a dowry of Rs. 10,00,000 (US$25,000) in cash, along with household items such as a refrigerator, washing machine, TV, music system, and a bike. Their exact words to my mother were, “We deserve to get back what we have invested in our child’s education.” Hearing a family speak in this way was shocking. It didn’t feel like a marriage proposal; it felt more like a business transaction where they expected a return on their investment with added profit. My mother decided not to consider any of her relatives for this family.

Rs. 10,00,000 is a significant amount for a middle-class Indian family. Most people cannot save such a sum in their entire lives. Furthermore, there is no guarantee that after paying this amount, the groom’s side won’t ask for more. Typically, greedy families continue to demand additional dowry even after the marriage. It’s horrifying to hear about brides being killed over dowry disputes. How can anyone kill a family member over money?

Another issue arises from the competition between sons-in-law. For instance, if a father has two daughters, he is expected to pay the same dowry for both. One of my friends has four brothers. The eldest got married about four years ago, and the second brother married about two years ago. The second brother received a bike as dowry, which the eldest had not. Consequently, the elder brother started pressuring his wife to ask her father for a bike, resulting in her father having to provide additional cash even after four years of marriage.

My cousin also wants a car for his marriage. He works at a travel agency and earns only Rs. 6,000 per month, which isn’t enough to cover the costs of petrol and maintenance for a car, yet he insists on having one. While there are NGOs that organize dowry-free marriages, they are still not widely known or practiced. Dowry remains a major factor contributing to the declining sex ratio in India. Although there are cultural issues at play, they are not as pervasive as the dowry system. I hope to see change in my lifetime, but I’m not sure if it will happen.

Why do people travel?

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In the past month, I met six Couchsurfing members, and I was surprised to find that four of them seemed unclear about the purpose of their travels. They spent most of their time sleeping and relaxing in their guesthouse rooms. Among them were two Germans and two Americans. The German visitors stayed in Benares for four days but didn’t explore much. They missed out on key experiences like Aarti and walks along the ghats, and only briefly watched a funeral without showing much interest in Aarti or Sarnath.

The American travelers were students. One of them was studying Urdu at an institute in Lucknow for a research project on Hindu-Muslim tensions. I was eager to learn more about her research, but unfortunately, I had to leave for Gwalior the day I met her. The other American was learning Hindi with Virendra Singh and had been living in Varanasi for a month. The Urdu student knew about Aarti but was unaware of Sarnath, while the Hindi student knew about Sarnath but hadn’t heard of Aarti. He had never even visited Godaulia, the downtown area of Benares. I’m unsure how he spent his time over the past month.

After finally seeing Aarti, he remarked that it was possibly the most impressive part of Benares for him. Natasha, the Urdu student, also enjoyed Aarti and decided to visit Sarnath the following day. Swami Vivekananda once said that if you have free time, traveling is a great way to utilize it because it allows you to learn about different cultures, engage with people, and make the world a better place. I believe that travel should be about learning and experiencing new things, but the individuals I met seemed to be traveling merely because they had extra time and money, or perhaps to boast about their travels. They could have gained similar knowledge and insights by spending time online in their own countries. I’m still puzzled about their real purpose for traveling.

Rinki’s good heart and her marriage

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Rinki, my uncle’s daughter, is now 25 years old. Her father has been searching for a groom for the past two years, but finding a match has been challenging. The primary issue is that Rinki had heart valve surgery a few years ago. Despite the fact that she was treated by one of the most renowned doctors in India, who has confirmed that she is in excellent health now, prospective grooms and their families have been hesitant. They are concerned that Rinki might still be unwell or could face future health issues. My uncle has made considerable efforts, approaching numerous families through his own connections, but to no avail.

He is even willing to offer dowry if needed, but no one agrees. My father also tried to find a groom for Rinki in Varanasi. A friend of his recommended a relative who has a Master’s degree in Astrology and works with his father, an astrologer. Initially, everything seemed promising. The groom’s family did not believe in dowry and appeared very accommodating. After meeting with them and discussing the proposal, my father took a photo of the groom to show our family. Everyone liked him, and the decision now rested on Rinki’s approval. My father informed Rinki’s father, who then traveled to Varanasi to meet the groom’s family.

He also liked the groom and agreed to the match. I was asked to send the groom’s photo to my brother in Noida, where Rinki is currently living, so she could see it and give her opinion. Given Rinki’s shy nature and the history of rejections she has faced, I knew she would likely not express any disapproval, even if she had reservations. Rinki did not view the photo but expressed her willingness to marry the groom chosen by her father. We also sent Rinki’s photo and her Kundali (horoscope) to the groom’s side. Everyone was excited about the wedding, which was planned for February.

My mother inquired about what gifts we would give Rinki, and the family was preparing to come to Varanasi for wedding shopping. Everyone was enthusiastic and hopeful. However, today we received disappointing news: the groom’s family has canceled the marriage. They claimed that Rinki is not as educated as the groom, which seemed like an unreasonable excuse. The groom holds a Master’s degree in Astrology, while Rinki has a Bachelor’s degree in Arts. The educational difference is minimal, and Rinki is still young and willing to pursue further education.

The cancellation was disheartening and left me feeling deeply saddened. It’s frustrating when educated people use such excuses, and it makes me question our society’s values. Repeated rejections can make Rinki feel like a burden to her family and cause her to doubt her worth, which is unfair. This situation highlights broader issues within our male-dominated and often uneducated society. It is distressing to see women’s rights continually violated and to witness the immense pressure placed on girls in small towns and villages. They are often presented as mere commodities in the marriage market, subjected to judgments about their appearance and perceived worth, and pressured into dowry arrangements that their families cannot afford.

Our sex ratio in 2001 was 933 girls for every 1,000 boys, and the imbalance continues to worsen. The future seems uncertain, and it is disheartening to think about how long it will take for girls and boys to have equal rights and opportunities.

Tour guide exam result

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The results for the tour guide exam have finally been declared, and I passed! The exam was held on August 26, 2007, and the results were announced on November 7, 2008, after more than a year. The government faced numerous challenges during this period, including four lawsuits from applicants on various grounds, but everything is now settled. Out of over 50,000 applicants, only 300 passed the exam, and I secured the 223rd rank. One notable observation from the results is that only eight women passed the exam.

This could be attributed to two factors: either parents are still reluctant to allow their daughters to work away from home, or women may feel insecure about such jobs. Indian girls in small cities are often highly qualified, pursuing higher education in fields like history or languages, which are well-suited for this profession. Despite the high demand for female tour guides, the number of successful female candidates remains low. I am now set to begin a sixteen-week training program, which includes fourteen weeks of classroom instruction and two weeks of touring various monuments in North India with a professor.

After completing this training and tour, another exam will be conducted. Those who pass the exam will undergo an interview, and upon successful completion, a tour guide license will be issued. This training is part of the preparations for the Commonwealth Games in 2010, so it seems likely that the government will not delay the start of the training. However, given the unpredictable nature of government processes, there might still be unforeseen delays. Despite this, I am excited about the training and eager to obtain my license so I can start working as a tour guide as soon as possible.