Kathmandu Gay Pride 2010

Posted on August 30, 2010 by nandan

I traveled to Nepal with my friend Babu to attend the Kathmandu Gay Pride, and it was truly an unforgettable experience. We took a bus from Varanasi to Sonauli, catching the last one at 8:30 PM. It was an overnight journey, and the bus ride was quite uncomfortable. The road was terrible, and I couldn’t sleep at all. We finally arrived at the Sonauli border at 7 AM and took a pedal rickshaw to cross. I was carrying some electronics like a video camera, photo camera, and voice recorder, and I wanted to declare them at the Indian customs office.

beautiful nature

When I told Babu about declaring the electronics, he laughed and said it wasn’t necessary. However, I had experienced issues before during my first trip to Nepal in 1996. Back then, I was traveling with my family. We had a camera, which we declared at the Sonauli border and received a receipt for. Unfortunately, we lost it while in Nepal, and on our return, customs checked our baggage, found the camera, and claimed it wasn’t allowed to bring electronics from Nepal to India.

Babu at Pashupati nath temple

We were shocked when they insisted it wasn’t our camera, despite having a receipt. The customs officers were simply looking for a bribe. We ended up giving them some money to be allowed to leave. This experience stayed in my mind, which is why I didn’t want to take any chances this time. When I approached the customs office at the Sonauli border to declare my electronics, the officers laughed and said, “You’re very smart.”

Beautiful

I declared my items and got a receipt, but they again asked for a bribe for issuing it. I questioned why they were asking for a bribe now, and one officer explained it was just the system. I offered Rs. 20, but he insisted on at least Rs. 50. In the end, I gave him Rs. 40 and received my receipt. I had hoped that by declaring my electronics in advance, I could avoid any problems or corruption, but it seemed unavoidable. After obtaining the receipt, we crossed the border into Nepal.

Wooden windows

Although Nepal had been a Hindu country until a few years ago, I expected its culture to be similar to India’s. However, there was a noticeable difference right at the border: different-looking people, clothing, more working women, and different vehicles. It felt like a completely different country. The one similarity was the presence of touts trying to exploit tourists. Many approached us immediately to sell bus tickets to Kathmandu and hotel rooms.

Temple doorways

Babu warned me that these touts often lied. They claimed a bus would leave within the hour, but Babu assured me that buses typically don’t leave before 4 PM. I was skeptical until my rickshaw driver confirmed it. There are direct buses from the Sonauli border to Kathmandu, but only in the early morning or late afternoon. Luckily, Babu was with me, and I avoided the touts. We took a bus from the Sonauli border to a place called Bhairava, which was only about a 30-minute ride.

Forest

Bhairava is the largest bus station near the Sonauli border, and there are regular buses to Kathmandu. We arrived by 9 AM and learned that a bus would leave at 9:30. I noticed something peculiar: Nepal has no government bus service, so all buses are private, with no fixed fares. I wasn’t aware I was supposed to bargain for the bus fare, but Babu handled it. The counter initially quoted us Rs. 450, but we ended up paying Rs. 350.

Greenery everywhere

The bus departed at 9:30 but was stopped 15 minutes later by the army. I thought they would check everyone, but they only looked around and inspected a few bags. Surprisingly, they weren’t just searching for weapons; they were also checking for potatoes and sugar. I laughed when Babu explained that the authorities wanted to prevent smuggling these items from India, where they are cheaper. It was interesting to learn about the trade dynamics.

pashupati nath temple

Nepali buses were cramped, with little legroom. It rained continuously from Sonauli to Kathmandu, and water even came in through the windows despite being closed. I was soaked for over 12 hours on the bus. The nature in Nepal was breathtaking—clean rivers, fresh air, and lush greenery. I noticed that there seemed to be more working women in Nepal than in India. Many shops were run by women, and they appeared to be in better circumstances than their Indian counterparts.

Signboard about family violence

Nepal appeared more progressive regarding women’s rights compared to India. Women traveled alone, worked in offices, ran shops, and even drove auto rickshaws. It was refreshing to see. I was particularly struck by the number of alcohol shops run by women—something I had never encountered in India. I met a female shop owner and struck up a conversation with her.

Nepali girl

I asked her if she felt safe managing an alcohol shop alone and dealing with often-drunk male customers. She replied that running the business was no different from how any male family member would manage it. When I inquired about societal attitudes towards women in alcohol sales, she mentioned that Nepali society is quite progressive in terms of women’s rights. She had never visited India but had seen it on TV, and she didn’t seem particularly excited about it.

liberal Nepali girl

I explained to her that it’s nearly impossible to find women selling alcohol in India and that there are fewer working women overall. She was aware of the situation and pointed out that many Indian families in Nepal restrict their women from working outside the home. When I asked what Nepali people think of this, she candidly said, “Honestly, we think Indians are crazy and backward.” I was taken aback, but it’s true that, in terms of women’s rights, India has a long way to go compared to Nepal.

the most beautiful alcohol bottle I had ever seen

An alcohol bottle

The nature throughout Nepal was stunning. It was clear that the environment remains largely untouched—thick jungles, beautiful rivers, fewer industries, less traffic, and majestic mountains. I truly enjoyed the natural beauty of Nepal. I noticed only five large factories during the entire bus ride from Sonauli to Kathmandu, and two of them were Indian factories. While this means less pollution, it also means fewer jobs, which contributes to poverty.

Luxury way to travel in Nepal

Poverty in Nepal struck me deeply. Along the Sonauli-Kathmandu highway, I saw many homes and people, but what was surprising was that many seemed to be doing nothing—just sitting around and chatting. It felt like they had no work to occupy them. I encountered numerous children selling water bottles and snacks along the road. Nepal has suffered significantly from political instability in recent years, which appears to be a major cause of its poverty. The Nepalis I spoke with seemed discontent with the political situation.

Beautiful window art

Finally, we arrived in Kathmandu around 8 PM, and it was still raining. I had read about a neighborhood called Thamel, known for its hotels, and I wanted to stay there. Babu warned me that locals often give wrong directions, so he suggested asking someone at an Indian-run shop. We found a paan shop, bought a few items, and asked for directions. Fortunately, the shopkeeper was helpful, and after about a 10-minute walk and a few inquiries, we made it to Thamel.

Cremations at Pashupati Nath temple

Thamel was bustling with hotels, making it a popular spot for backpackers. We checked several hotels, but the prices were steep. Babu said we could find a room for around 500 NR, but none offered rates below 1000 INR. Eventually, we reached Annapurna Hotel, where they wanted to charge us 800 INR per night. I mentioned I was a government-approved tour guide in India, and they agreed to give me a room for 500 INR.

To be honest I did not like it at all

The hotel initially seemed nice, but we soon discovered that the pillow covers and bed sheets were used, the cable connection didn’t work, and the telephone was dead. We complained, and they promised to fix everything by the next morning, but that morning never came before we left. I wasn’t there to enjoy luxury, watch TV, or make calls from my room, so I didn’t mind too much. We went out for dinner, but most restaurants were closed by 8:30 PM. We eventually found an open restaurant and had our meal.

I had read various articles about nightlife in Nepal, including dance bars and massage centers. Some claimed it was safe, while others warned of potential dangers. Many articles described how people would spend significant money at nightclubs and face misbehavior. I also read about underage kids involved in the sex industry. Curiosity got the better of us, and we decided to visit at least one nightclub in Kathmandu.

While walking around Thamel, I noticed numerous massage parlors. As we passed one, a boy who appeared to be about 15 approached me and asked what I was looking at. I explained I was merely checking out the advertisements. He insisted that I was interested in something special. I clarified that I wasn’t looking for anything like that. He continued to follow us, offering young, beautiful girls at low prices. There were many pimps lurking around, watching tourists.

I managed to return to my hotel safely. The next day, we worked for a while, explored, and did some shopping. I missed vegetarian Indian food,

Women in Nepal and India

Posted on August 30, 2010 by nandan

I noticed that there were more working women in Nepal than in India. Most of the shops were run by women, and Nepali women seemed to be in better condition than Indian women. Nepal appeared to be more progressive in terms of women’s rights compared to India. Women were traveling alone, going to offices, running shops, and even driving auto rickshaws. They seemed more friendly with men, which looked really cool to me. I was happy to see it. I saw many alcohol shops run by women. I had never seen anything like that anywhere in India. Once, I came across an alcohol shop with a woman owner, and I decided to talk to her. I began by asking about the alcohol, and once we became friendly, I asked her about her life.

I asked her if she felt safe sitting alone at an alcohol shop and dealing with male customers who might be drunk. She told me that managing the business was just like any other male member of her family managing a business; there was no difference, so it wasn’t a problem for her. I inquired whether people in society minded women working at alcohol shops, and she said that Nepali society is very progressive regarding equal rights for women. When I asked if she had ever been to India, she replied that she had never visited but had seen India on TV. In reality, she didn’t seem excited about visiting India.

I told her that it was nearly impossible to find women selling alcohol in India and that there was a lower percentage of working women there. She said she was very well aware of the situation for women in India. She mentioned that many Indian families live in Nepal and do not allow their women to work. When I asked her what Nepali people thought of this situation, she candidly said that they think Indians are backward. I was surprised to hear this, but it is true that we are much more backward than Nepal in terms of women’s rights and equality.

The nature in Nepal was stunning. One could easily see that it is still untouched. There were beautiful thick jungles, clear rivers, fewer industries, fewer people, less traffic, and many mountains—it was just amazing. I really enjoyed the natural beauty in Nepal. I also noticed that I saw only five large factories during my entire bus ride from Sonauli to Kathmandu. In fact, two of them were Indian factories, which is nice because it means less pollution. However, this also means fewer jobs and more poverty.

Poverty in Nepal was striking. There were so many family houses along the Sonauli-Kathmandu highway, and I saw people just sitting or talking, seemingly without any work. I had never seen so many young people just hanging around and passing time. Many kids were selling water bottles and snacks on the road. Nepal has been suffering from political instability for years, which seems to be the main reason for the poverty. I don’t know if there are other reasons, but Nepalis do not seem happy with their political system.

Finally, we arrived in Kathmandu by 8 PM, and it was still raining. I had read about a neighborhood called Thamel, which is full of hotels. I wanted to stay there. I asked Babu to ask some locals for directions, but he said Nepali people are often not helpful and might not give the right directions. He suggested that I go to any shop run by an Indian and ask for directions to Thamel. We went to a paan shop, bought a few things, and fortunately, the owner was kind enough to give us the correct directions. It took us about 10 minutes of walking, and after asking a few more people, we finally arrived.

We reached Thamel, which was bustling with hotels; in fact, it is the most popular neighborhood in Nepal for backpackers. We checked several hotels, but their prices seemed too steep. Babu mentioned that we could easily find a hotel room for 500 NR, but none of them wanted to charge us less than 1000 NR. Eventually, we found a place called Annapurna Hotel, where they initially wanted to charge us 800 NR per night. I told them that I was a government-approved tour guide in India and usually receive discounts. They agreed to give me a room for 500 NR.

The hotel seemed nice at first, but later we realized that the pillow covers and bed sheets were used, the cable connection wasn’t working properly, and the telephone was dead. We complained and were promised that everything would be fixed by the next morning, but that morning never came before we left. In any case, I wasn’t there to enjoy luxury, watch TV, or make phone calls, so I didn’t mind too much. We went out for dinner, but most of the shops were closed by 8:30 PM. We finally found an open restaurant and had our dinner there.

I had read several articles about nightlife in Nepal, including dance bars and massage centers. Many articles claimed that the nightlife was safe, while others described it as crazy and dangerous. Several articles mentioned how people spent a few hours at a nightclub, had a few beers and dinner, and ended up paying Rs. 40,000-50,000 for misbehavior. Some articles talked about how 14-15-year-olds are involved in the sex industry and work as pimps. I was curious about what was going on and decided we should visit at least one nightclub while in Kathmandu.

While wandering in Thamel, I noticed many massage parlors. As we passed one shop with a sign for massage services, I pointed it out to Babu. Suddenly, a boy who looked about 15 approached me and asked what I was looking at. I told him I was just observing the advertisements, but he insisted I was looking for something else, something special. I assured him I was just browsing. He asked again if I needed a special service, and I replied that I did not.

We walked away, but the boy kept following us, asking if we needed a girl. He offered young, beautiful girls at very low prices. He wasn’t alone; there were many pimps around watching tourists. Nevertheless, I managed to return to my hotel safely. The next day, we worked for a while, explored, and did some shopping. It was a nice experience, although I really missed vegetarian Indian food since it seemed to be meat everywhere. On the plus side, drinks were readily available, so I enjoyed trying different kinds of alcohol.

I wanted to use an ATM in Kathmandu but was concerned about international transaction fees. However, Babu informed me that a few Indian banks, like the State Bank of India and Punjab National Bank, have ATMs in Kathmandu. I found a State Bank of India ATM near Darbar Square, used it, and didn’t pay any transaction fees. I would recommend anyone with an Indian bank card to look for Indian bank ATMs in Kathmandu. Phone calls to India were also very cheap; I paid only Rs. 1 per minute.

Since we were interested in visiting a nightclub in Kathmandu, we gathered information online. Fortunately, I met a guy at the NGO where I was supposed to work who was a male prostitute. Who could provide better information about nightlife than him? I asked him about it, and he advised against visiting nightclubs in Kathmandu, stating they are not safe for tourists. He echoed what I had read online, so we decided not to visit any nightclubs.

We visited a few temples, markets, and participated in Kathmandu Gay Pride. Eventually, my time in Kathmandu came to an end, and we needed to head home. Babu informed me that there were overnight buses from Kathmandu to Sonauli until 10 PM. We arrived at the bus station around 8 PM, but all the buses had already left. They told us the last bus was at 7 PM. So we had dinner, stayed at a hotel near the bus station, and took an early morning bus to Sonauli, followed by another bus from Sonauli to Varanasi. It was a successful journey full of learning, and I plan to return to Kathmandu sometime for a longer stay.

Varanasi tours

Posted on August 10, 2010 by nandan

I recently worked with a travel agency as a mute guide for an Italian group. The group already had an escort who knew Varanasi very well, but he didn’t have a tourist guide license, so I was hired to accompany the group as their mute guide. I had previously worked with many tourists as a tour guide in Varanasi, all of whom were my direct clients, but I had no experience working with a group traveling through a travel agency, so I was excited to take on this opportunity.

I was asked to meet the group at Sarnath, where they would arrive directly from the airport. When I met them, the escort instructed me to stay with him at all the entrance points of the monuments. The group first visited the Sarnath ruins, and I saw the escort explaining something in Italian for about 10-15 minutes. Then he gave the clients free time and came back to me. The clients were left to wander around the ruins on their own, which seemed like a nice idea to me.

After the ruins, we headed to the museum, where the escort explained only four statues before giving the clients more free time and returning to me. Once again, the clients were alone. I asked him if he had checked with the clients about whether they wanted his company or preferred to explore on their own. He replied that he never asks; he just tells them in a very professional way to go explore the place independently. This sounded a little strange to me. I also give my clients free time, but I ask them first. Still, I wasn’t sure if my approach was better than his, especially since the clients never seemed to complain.

After visiting the museum, we headed straight to the hotel, which surprised me because the clients did not get to visit the Buddha Temple and the Bodhi Tree—both significant places for Buddhists and Hindus. In fact, these are the only places where you see people actively participating in rituals, which seemed more interesting than visiting a museum or ruins. Nonetheless, the clients didn’t complain, likely because they were unaware of these important sites.

After checking in at the hotel, the clients had an hour to get ready for their visit to Dashashwamedh Ghat. I finally met them again at Dashashwamedh Ghat, where a boat was waiting for us. We took the boat to Manikarnika Ghat to see the cremation ground. We spent hardly ten minutes there before heading back to Dashashwamedh Ghat for the evening ceremony. After the ceremony, the clients returned to the hotel, and I went home.

The next morning, I met them again for a boat ride at 5 AM. We enjoyed about an hour on the river before walking through the narrow alleys of Varanasi and visiting Vishwanath Temple (The Golden Temple). The clients entered the temple with the escort while I waited outside. After their visit, the tour concluded. It was a unique experience for me, but I couldn’t help but think about those poor clients who spent only 20 hours in Varanasi—12 of which were in the hotel, 3 in the bus, and hardly 5 exploring a city where one could easily spend three to four days, and even that might not be enough.

After the tour, one of the clients asked the escort to take him to the old city because he wanted to photograph the people and their daily lives. The escort asked me to take him to the Dashashwamedh Ghat area but instructed me not to take the client further away and to give him some free time. We took an autorickshaw to the area, but as soon as I got off the vehicle, I asked the client if he wanted to go alone or if he wanted me to accompany him. I could see he was confused.

He asked me to come along, so I took him to Dashashwamedh Ghat, then to the vegetable market, and finally walked through the alleys where the real life of Varanasi was happening. The client was surprised, shocked, and happy. He told me he had never seen a place like the one I showed him. He took many pictures and asked a lot of innocent questions, making it clear that he didn’t know much about India. When we reached the vegetable market, he asked if it was for people living in the slums. I told him that this is how our vegetable markets are everywhere, and he said he hadn’t seen anything like it during his entire trip.

Once, I asked the escort how much the travel agency charged the clients, and I was shocked to hear that they paid about Rs. 20,000 ($500) per day per person. With six people in the group, that totaled Rs. 1,20,000 ($3,000) for just 5 hours of travel and accommodation in a Taj hotel. They didn’t even visit the Buddha Temple, the Bodhi Tree, or see people going about their daily lives along the river—experiences that I think are the most interesting for foreign visitors to Varanasi. I feel sorry for tourists like that, but maybe they prefer it that way; who knows? Nonetheless, it was a valuable experience for me to work with them.

Kashmir Issue

Posted on July 31, 2010 by nandan

My Journey to Jammu & Kashmir

I returned from a trip to Jammu & Kashmir a few days ago. Although I couldn’t complete my pilgrimage—since the police stopped us from entering the Kashmir Valley due to bad weather and ongoing violence—I have no regrets. I still had the chance to talk with locals and members of the Indian Army about one of the biggest social issues in India: the Kashmir conflict and the tensions between Hindus and Muslims.

My main purpose was to visit the Amarnath Temple, one of the holiest places on earth for Hindus. I had last been to Kashmir about ten years ago, at a time when the valley was beginning to recover and tourism was slowly returning. Back then, I saw no violence. Locals were happy and hopeful, welcoming visitors with warmth, as terrorism seemed to be on the decline. Since the economy of Kashmir depends heavily on tourism, peace was vital for them. But even a small spark of tension between India and Pakistan can bring the entire valley to a standstill.

This time, we reached Jammu by train and hired a taxi to Pahalgam, the base camp for the Amarnath Yatra. We left our hotel at around 10 a.m., full of excitement. But our journey was cut short—the police stopped us, citing bad weather, and refused to let us proceed. Our driver whispered that sometimes the police do this for no reason and suggested we speak to them. We tried, but they told us to wait. Nearby, I noticed an army check-post where some pilgrims were going inside. I decided to approach them too.

At the army office, our driver suggested we pretend we wanted to go to Katra instead of Amarnath. When I explained this to the officer, he told me he could only help if I had relatives in the army. Technically, I do—but I didn’t want to cause delay, so I said no. Fortunately, when he found out that I was from near Varanasi, he warmed up. He made it clear that the Indian Army never accepts bribes, but if I wanted to “understand how the J&K police function,” I could try offering them some money. He mentioned Rs. 500. He himself refused to intervene, since the army despises the J&K police for their corruption.

I was shocked, but at least it gave me a direction. We offered a police officer Rs. 300 per taxi, and he agreed. Just as we were about to proceed, another officer noticed us, turned aggressive, and the first officer also pretended to be angry. We were pushed back into line. While waiting, I struck up a conversation with another army man. What he told me disturbed me even more. He claimed that J&K no longer truly felt like a part of India, that even he didn’t know where it stood. He said the army was only there to protect people and added, bitterly, that if the army left even for a single day, the J&K police would “sell the entire region” to outsiders. According to him, the police were deeply corrupt and one of the main reasons terrorism still survived.

We spent ten hours waiting and were finally told to return and try again at 4 a.m. the next morning. When we did, the same thing happened—we were stopped again. As I stood in line, I met a young boy from Anantnag. He told me his family was too poor for him to study, so he sold hot water to pilgrims. Curious, I asked him if he had ever seen a terrorist. At first, he denied it, visibly uncomfortable. But after some time, he opened up. What he revealed broke my heart. Terrorists often came to his village and forced locals to host them. Families lived in fear—if they reported them to the army, they believed they would be killed sooner or later.

He said terrorists had even stayed in his house, and he felt powerless when they harassed his sister. Tears rolled down his face as he spoke. I was left speechless. He also told me about a friend’s family who had once hosted three militants. The army arrived for a routine ID check. When one soldier inside asked for ID, the terrorists opened fire and killed him. The army retaliated by blowing up the house, killing everyone inside. Locals protested against the army, but who was truly at fault? The terrorists, the army, or the helpless family? I still don’t know.

When I asked my driver what the people of Kashmir really wanted, his answer surprised me: “Neither India, nor Pakistan. They want independence.” I struggled to understand this. Independence would only mean poverty and isolation for years. In my view, staying with India is the most practical option—India has more resources, more opportunities, and a stronger future than Pakistan. But the driver disagreed. He said the army and politicians were the real problem, accusing soldiers of killing innocents and blaming America for all global tensions. I couldn’t accept that fully, but I realized how deep the resentment runs among the people.

Though I never reached Amarnath, my friends who went earlier shared chilling stories—kids on the streets shouting, “This is our land, not yours, you Indians,” and stone-pelting mobs attacking pilgrim vehicles. More than 200 cars were damaged. The hatred seemed to begin from such a young age. After four days in J&K, I returned with heavy questions in my heart. Why do people there see me, an Indian, as an outsider in my own country? Are we fighting for land, or for the rights of people who don’t even feel Indian? I don’t know if I have the right answers, but I do know this: Kashmir is India, and I hope one day the people of the valley can live in peace, free of terrorism, and once again welcome pilgrims and tourists with the spirit of Atithi Devo Bhava.

Peace.

Parrots

Posted on July 20, 2010 by nandan

My Parrots

A few days ago, my family brought home a parrot. But when I first saw him, I was genuinely upset—I don’t like to see birds in cages. Birds are meant to fly free in the sky, not stay trapped inside a small cage. I decided to release him, but when I took him up to the rooftop, I realized he was badly injured and unable to fly. He tried very hard, but he could barely walk. He hid himself behind a plant on the roof and refused to come out. My guest, Attila, also saw him and explained that the parrot’s wings had been clipped, and he needed more time to recover.

sports inside the cage

Sports Inside the Cage

We decided to keep the parrot for a few weeks, feed him well, and let him practice flying. Attila gave him one of his rooms, where the parrot lived freely. Attila also asked me if there was any bird doctor or parrot expert in Varanasi. I searched but found none. Finally, Attila contacted an expert in Hungary and arranged an online video consultation. We showed the parrot to the expert, who gave us valuable guidance.

They Love Having a Partner

The consultation opened our eyes. We were shocked to learn that the parrot wasn’t six months old, as we had assumed, but at least three years old. The expert confirmed that he was male and had been injured by wing clipping. If the clipping had not been done too harshly, there was still hope for his wings to regrow. I was happy to hear this, though still unsure whether the clipping had been done forcefully or not.

Their Bedroom

Attila kept in regular contact with the expert, who shared many important things about parrots that most people in India—including us—didn’t know. That’s why I decided to write this post: so others can also benefit from this knowledge. Parrots are deeply loved in India, but sadly, most people don’t know how to care for them properly. Many parrots die young because of harmful practices. While a parrot’s natural lifespan is 25–30 years, most in India survive only a few.

Here are some key things I learned about parrot care:

1. Cage Size

Never keep parrots in a small cage. They are wild birds, meant to live in nature. A cramped cage harms both their mental and physical health. Always buy the biggest cage you can afford and fit at home. My parrot’s cage is 3 feet deep, 3 feet tall, and 3 feet wide.

2. Cage Material

Avoid painted cages. Parrots climb using their beaks, and paint contains harmful chemicals if ingested.

3. Play and Activities

Add sticks, branches, and swings inside the cage. Parrots love to play. (Of course, they don’t play cricket or football! 😊)

4. Signs of Boredom

If your parrot is pacing in circles all the time, it means he is unhappy and bored. This can severely harm his mental and physical health.

5. Food

Never feed cooked food to parrots. They are used to raw fruits, vegetables, and grains. This is the healthiest diet for them.

6. Chilis

Never feed chilies. Many Indians think parrots like them, but parrots cannot taste spiciness. If you give them only chilies, they will eat them out of hunger, but it damages their health.

7. Sand Bowl

Keep a small bowl of clean sand in the cage. Parrots eat a little sand sometimes to get minerals that help them digest food.

8. Free Flying Time

Allow your parrot to fly freely inside your house once a week for a few hours. This exercise keeps them active and happy.

9. Safe Corner

Cover one corner of the cage with cloth or cardboard. Parrots feel secure under such shade, using it as their “bedroom.”

10. A Life Partner

If you plan to keep a parrot for a long time, bring him a partner. Parrots are the second-smartest wild creatures on earth. They need companionship and suffer if left lonely and bored.

Final Thoughts

I don’t believe in taking away anyone’s freedom. But if you choose to keep a parrot as a pet, please follow these guidelines. If you do, your parrot will live a happy and healthy life—and you will also enjoy seeing him play and bond with you. I’ll keep updating this post whenever I learn something new. If you have any questions about parrots, feel free to write to me. I’ll do my best to find the right answer for you.

Thanks!

their bedroom

Kolkata Gay Pride 2010

Posted on July 10, 2010 by nandan

Beginning of the Parade

I had the opportunity to attend Kolkata Gay Pride on the 2nd of July. I arrived in Kolkata on the 1st, after attending Chennai Pride and spending a few days in Bangalore. My friend Sourendra from Mumbai introduced me to Mr. Rajshree Chakrobarty, Secretary of the Dum Dum Society and one of the organizers of Kolkata Pride. I knew that Kolkata was the first city in India to host a pride march, so I expected it to be the biggest one this year as well. But when I reached the parade venue, I was shocked to see that there were hardly 50 people present.

Begining of the parade

Mr. Chakrobarty Explains

Before I could even ask, Mr. Chakrobarty told me why the turnout was so low. He explained that most of the organizations working on gay rights in Kolkata had boycotted the parade due to internal politics. As a result, only the Dum Dum Society and another group called Anandam organized the event this year. I was surprised to hear this but also glad that at least someone took the initiative to keep the parade alive.

Mr. Chakrobarty

The Parade

The parade began at Jatin Das Park near Hazra Crossing and ended at the Academy of Fine Arts. It started with around 40–50 participants but was lively and full of energy. Having attended several pride parades in India over the past year, I found Kolkata’s to be the most liberal and open. Nobody wore masks to hide their identity. An auto rickshaw with loudspeakers led the march while participants sang songs about human rights, equality, and gender justice. They also distributed pamphlets about LGBT rights.

Good message

Growing Numbers

It rained for most of the march, but that didn’t stop people from joining. By the time we reached the Academy of Fine Arts, the crowd had grown to over 100 participants. The most inspiring moment for me was seeing so many young lesbian couples join towards the end. I had never seen so many lesbians at a pride event in India—not in Mumbai, Delhi, or Chennai. What struck me most was their age: they were very young, unlike the older women I had usually seen. These young women knew their families would find out if they marched publicly, but they still chose to participate. That level of openness and courage really impressed me.

Very colorful event

Speeches and Performances

At the Academy, the parade concluded with speeches by Mr. Ranjeet Sinha, Mr. Rajshree Chakrobarty, and other social activists. Later, I joined Mr. Chakrobarty for a cultural program organized by Saathi, which provided a platform for the LGBT community to showcase their talents. The program included dance performances, fashion shows featuring designs created by LGBT members, and traditional Kolkata songs. I was amazed by the quality of the performances. The municipality chairman attended as the chief guest, and the event drew a crowd of nearly 500 people—much larger than the parade itself.

Cultural dance performance

Learning from Kolkata

During my time there, I interviewed Mr. Chakrobarty, Mr. Ranjeet Sinha, and several others from the community. Mr. Chakrobarty told me that gay activism in Kolkata began as early as 1989, making it one of the first cities in India to do so. Today, there are about six or seven organizations working on LGBT rights in the city. He explained that conditions for LGBT people in the city are better than in suburban or rural areas, largely due to greater media presence and more active organizations. However, compared to Mumbai and Delhi, life in Kolkata is still more difficult, as it is the poorest metropolitan city in India.

the most important message

Discrimination and Social Challenges

Mr. Chakrobarty also pointed out that transgender people face the harshest discrimination because their identities are more visible. He emphasized that while all LGBT individuals face discrimination, trans people often bear the brunt of it. We also discussed the common misconception in India that homosexuality is a disease or a temporary fashion—something that can be “cured” by marriage or yoga, as suggested by figures like Baba Ramdev. Like others I have interviewed, he firmly said this is impossible: sexuality cannot be changed. Many gay men marry under family pressure but continue same-sex relationships, proving that marriage is not a solution.

She was very active

He also reminded me that homosexuality has always existed in Indian culture, citing references in Hindu scriptures, temple carvings, and even stories from the Ramayana. He noted that Section 377 was a colonial law imposed by the British, and that the Delhi High Court’s judgment to strike it down was a step toward justice.

Meeting Mr. Ranjeet Sinha

I also had the privilege of meeting Mr. Ranjeet Sinha, a transgender activist working in Kolkata and surrounding districts. He shared the struggles trans people face, including the lack of recognition in official documents like passports and voter IDs. He spoke about the humiliation trans people often face in public toilets and demanded separate facilities. He also told me about a transgender activist friend with AIDS who was forced by doctors to dress as a man before being admitted to the hospital. Mr. Sinha criticized NGOs for focusing solely on HIV/AIDS and neglecting broader issues affecting the transgender community. He praised South Indian states, especially Chennai, for making more progress on transgender rights.

Good slogan

Final Thoughts

Kolkata Pride may have been smaller this year, but it taught me so much. I was deeply inspired by the courage of the young participants, the dedication of people like Mr. Chakrobarty and Mr. Sinha, and the resilience of the community despite internal challenges. I sincerely hope that next year, all organizations will put aside their differences and come together to make Kolkata Pride as strong and vibrant as it deserves to be—a true celebration of equal rights for all.

He had a lot of fun

Shimla

Posted on July 5, 2010 by nandan

Kalka-Shimla railway track

It was the first time when I visited Shimla and I was so excited for this visit as I was going for vacations after a really long time and heat was just killing me in Varanasi and the weather was really nice in Himanchal Pradesh. We took an overnight train from Varanasi to Delhi first and then took another train from Delhi to Kalka in the evening and stayed overnight in Kalka because we wanted to go to Shimla by a toy train and the next train was only in the early morning time. We had tried to book the tickets online for this toy train but all the seats were already booked.

The world heritage train

There were other options also but we wanted to take this train only because Kalka-Shimla train route is world heritage site and we wanted to experience it. We showed up at the Kalka railway station in the morning time and they told us that there were seats vacant in the train which would be leaving after only ten minutes. Our hotel was at least five minutes walk from the railway station but we decided to take a risk by buying the tickets. We ran to the hotel, packed all of our luggage and showed up at the railway station within ten minutes.

Open compartment of the train

We had to do everything very fast because the railway officers told us that the train was going to leave within ten minutes but the train left after an hour. Anyways, we were able to catch the train. We were told that it would take about six hours from Kalka to Shimla but it took about ten hours, but still we enjoyed it actually. I was amazed to see how the British had built this railway line on the mountains. There were 102 tunnels and 988 bridges only during the small railway track of 96 kilometers. Some of the bridges just shocked me. I have heard that many photographers come from all over the world just to photograph those bridges and engineers come from all over the world to see those bridges to learn about the construction.

View from the train

The nature was just awesome all the way starting from Kalka till Shimla. The train was running all the time on the mountains. It was green everywhere. There were several stations in between Kalka and Shimla where the train would stop. I tasted a lot of different kinds of fruits which are available only on the mountains. Finally we arrived in Shimla after eleven hours of tiring but nice journey. We decided to leave all of our luggage at the railway station and go looking for hotels. As we started walking out of the railway station, one porter asked us if we need a hotel.

Beautiful bridge

We told him that we would find the hotel on our own but this creepy man did not want to leave us alone. He was following us continuously. We went to a few hotels but could not get any room. This porter was still following us so finally we decided to give him a chance and asked us to take us to some hotel. He took us to a few hotels and all of those hotels were expensive and did not want to sell the room alone and they said that they would give us a room only if we take the taxi from them. It was crazy. Then we decided to go to any travel agent to book the hotel and taxi both because we wanted to hire a taxi next for the couple of days.

Such writings were everywehre on the train stations

Such writings were everywhere on the train stations

Then we went to a travel agent and this guy was asking just too much money. Actually before leaving Varanasi once we had contacted a car rental service in Chandigarah and they wanted to charge Rs. 14,000 for the taxi and these guys in Shimla were asking for Rs. 24,000. This porter was continuously following us and we started feeling uncomfortable with it. I told him several times very politely to leave us alone but he was just too much. Once I got angry and started shouting at him but he still wanted to chase us. It was getting late and finally we decided to get cheated and buy the hotel and taxi from a travel agent.

Another writing

The major problem in Shimla with us was that neither the hotels nor the travel agents wanted to sell the room alone; they all wanted to sell the room, the taxi, sight seeing and guide all together. You ask them for a hotel room and they tell you rates for all those services. It was a very well organized crime by the hotels and travel agents. Finally we paid Rs. 22,000 for the taxi for five days and two rooms for one night in Shimla. The travel agent showed us a video of the hotel room but once we arrived there, we realized that the room we were shown was different than the room we got.

Shimla

After all these problems we decided to get out of Shimla as soon as possible. We slept in the same hotel and when I woke up I found that my glasses were gone somewhere. I searched for my glasses everywhere in the room but could not find them. Then I called the hotel reception and asked them if they knew something about it and their answer was really shocking. They asked me if the room’s window was open and I said yes and then they said: monkey took your glasses. I was like how is this possible? I asked him why did he not inform me if there was such problem in that area or why did they not screen all the windows but those crazy people had no answer.

Look at this word

I bought some new glasses in Shimla, took the taxi and left Shimla immediately. We just did not feel like staying there even for a few minutes. I just hate Shimla because of the people working in the tourism sector there. They are criminals. But there were a few good things also. There is a place called Mall Road in Shimla which had the cleanest street I had ever seen in all of India. Even vehicles are also prohibited in Mall Road. The architecture was completely British. Attila and his wife Dora told me that Shimla looked exactly like European cities. Especially the architecture of the buildings and the English word they were using in Shimla were complete British.

People also looked different

This always strikes me that although British updated themselves but we still follow all the British things. The buildings were nice but what about their crazy rules that were never updated? We had to come back to Shimla after visiting Manali and Tirthan valley. I left for Chennai to work and Bunti, Babu, Attila and Dora stayed in Shimla for two more nights because they wanted to see nearby places. Attila looked for some hotels in lonely planet and we found a really nice and honest hotel in Shimla called Hotel White. The location was just awesome, it being hardly 2 minutes from the Mall Road. We asked our driver to take us to the Hotel White but he did not know about this hotel. We asked a few locals and somehow reached the hotel.

View of Shimla from the Hotel White

This was the first hotel we had been in whole Shimla that had mentioned all of their rates clearly on a board near the reception. I always try to get a discount in hotels by showing my tour guide ID card and did the same with this hotel also but they did not give me any discount but I was happy that at least I was not over charged. I asked them why not many people knew about their hotel and they said that since they do not give any commission to the drivers or travel agents, nobody knows them. I felt like staying for some time in Shimla after finding this hotel but unfortunately I had to leave because of my work in Chennai. I would like to go to Shimla again and stay at Hotel White in Lakkad Bazaar and explore the town.

Chennai Gay Pride 2010

Posted on June 28, 2010 by nandan

Chennai Gay Pride – June 27

It was Chennai Gay Pride yesterday, on the 27th of June, and I went to attend the festival. The event wasn’t as large as I had expected, but it was still significant enough to attract attention from the local community and raise awareness about LGBTQ+ issues. I was expecting at least 1,000–2,000 participants, but the turnout was closer to 400–500. The parade began near the Labor Statue at Marina Beach at 5 PM and lasted for over an hour. It was organized with the support of several organizations working for LGBTQ+ rights in Chennai, with Shakti Center being one of the most prominent names involved.

Foreign participants

The Parade Atmosphere

The participants seemed genuinely happy and energetic, especially those from the LGBTQ+ community. Unlike the Delhi and Mumbai Pride parades, which had loud music and people dancing, Chennai Pride didn’t feature music. Still, participants sang songs in Tamil (which I couldn’t understand), laughed, danced, and hugged each other with joy. I noticed that there were fewer lesbian couples compared to Delhi and Mumbai, and overall the atmosphere felt a little less open. In Delhi and Mumbai, many participants walked hand in hand with their partners, making their relationships visible. In Chennai, however, most people seemed more reserved, perhaps reflecting the city’s more conservative, religious outlook.

People from the organizing committee

Conversations with Organizers

I spoke with one of the organizers who told me that last year’s parade had more people, but many were outside supporters. This year, though the crowd was smaller, more members of the community itself participated—which he considered an important step forward. Since the parade took place at Marina Beach, a popular weekend spot, thousands of locals watched. I handed out pamphlets and masks to curious onlookers. Interestingly, the use of masks was much higher here compared to Delhi and Mumbai. Some participants even wore two or three masks at once to completely cover their faces. When I asked them why, they explained that Chennai is still very conservative, and they didn’t want to risk being recognized.

There were families also

Attitudes and Challenges

Many participants expressed concern about how society perceives them. Some said, “If people see us in the parade, they’ll think we’re gay too.” This showed how stigma and fear of judgment still run deep here. I also spoke to Mr. Annirudhan Vasudevan, one of the parade organizers. He admitted that while the Delhi High Court’s decision to decriminalize same-sex relations had brought some change, it wasn’t enough to transform society. He said, “At least people are talking about it now. They know that something called the LGBTQ community exists and that we too have rights.”

I also think so

Annirudhan stressed that discrimination is widespread across India, and the community needs legal protection, medical care, and equal rights. He also highlighted the tragic case of Prof. Srinivas Siras from Aligarh Muslim University, who was suspended after being filmed in a private moment with a same-sex partner. The humiliation pushed him to take his own life, despite homosexuality being legal. This conversation made me realize how much more progress is needed—not just in laws, but in changing public attitudes.

Mr. Annirudh

The Pride Party

The night before the parade, there was a party at a four-star boutique hotel, Le Waterina, at Kotivakkam Beach. It was the most expensive Pride party I’d attended in India. Entry in Delhi was free, and in Mumbai it was ₹500 with reasonably priced drinks. In Chennai, the entry was ₹500, but drinks were very costly. At the party, I met locals who didn’t even know about the parade but had been invited to the event via SMS. Some hesitated to talk about the parade, reflecting again how cautious people are about revealing their identity. Still, I saw many of them at the parade the next day. One highlight of the party was a male go-go dancer—a first for me. Dressed in shorts and later removing his T-shirt, he performed for over an hour, and the crowd went wild. His presence added a new level of excitement to the celebration.

Go-Go dancer at teh party

Final Thoughts

Despite the challenges, I was glad to be part of Chennai Pride. The event showed both the struggles and the resilience of the community here. I hope that with time, Chennai Pride will grow larger, attract more supporters, and become more open—just like in Delhi and Mumbai. One thing is clear: LGBTQ+ rights will not advance without support from allies. It is our responsibility, as straight people, to stand with the community and help create a more equal world.

My friends and I

More Pics:

https://photos.app.goo.gl/wHjjzmTWsTcVn2xVA

Rohtang Pass

Posted on June 25, 2010 by nandan

Trip to Rohtang Pass

After visiting Shimla and Manali, we headed to Rohtang Pass—the only place on our entire journey where we could actually see snow. We were all so excited. Our driver warned us that we needed to leave very early in the morning; otherwise, we would get stuck in heavy traffic later in the day and might not even reach the snow. We woke up at 5 a.m. and were ready by 6. The driver insisted we were already late, which we thought was just a joke. But he was right. About 15 kilometers before Rohtang, we got stuck in one of the biggest traffic jams I had ever seen in my life. Cars and buses lined up for kilometers along the mountain road—it was a complete disaster.

the traffic jam

Renting Clothes for the Snow

Before the trip, the driver had asked if we had brought warm clothes. When he saw what we had, he said they were not enough for the snow and insisted we rent special clothing. Attila, who had already been to several snowy places, told me such clothing wasn’t necessary for Rohtang. But since the driver kept pushing, I finally agreed. He took us to a shop that rented out long jackets and boots—basically factory rejects—for ₹1000 a set. It was far too expensive. I asked him to take us somewhere else, but he claimed there were only a few shops and we wouldn’t find any more on the way. After bargaining, we got the clothes for ₹500. I knew it was still overpriced, but I had no choice, especially since I was worried about my wife and baby.

Later, as we drove toward Rohtang, I realized the driver had cheated us. There were countless shops along the way, all renting similar clothes for just ₹50! Even at the pass itself, shops were everywhere, and in truth, the weather wasn’t cold enough to require such heavy clothing. We never even used the clothes we had rented.

people enjoying the snow

First Impressions of Rohtang

When we finally reached Rohtang Pass, it was both exciting and disappointing. Yes, there was snow—but much of it was ruined. It was black in places, littered with garbage, and even spoiled by animals. Plastic waste was everywhere, as usual. There were snow bikes, snowboards, and even hand-pulled carts for tourists. The cart service was particularly upsetting. People would sit in a chair while two or three men physically pulled them uphill and then brought them down. It was exhausting work in thin air, and I couldn’t understand how tourists could actually enjoy such a service.

it was everywhere

The snow bike drivers were reckless too. Despite the crowds, they zoomed around dangerously. The snowboard rental was just as strange—they had only one pair of boots, and every customer, regardless of shoe size, was expected to wear them. I had never skied before, but it looked unsafe. Attila confirmed that using the wrong-sized boots could even break your ankles. Still, many tourists rented boards and struggled hilariously on the slopes—it was quite a sight to watch.

They looked fit enough but….

The Experience

We spent about four hours on the snow, enjoyed the scenery, and had a good laugh watching others try their luck with skiing. Around 5 p.m., we headed back to our hotel. Overall, Rohtang Pass was a memorable experience—though I will always remember how our driver cheated us out of a few hundred rupees.

snow bikes

Coca-Cola Varanasi

Posted on May 20, 2010 by nandan

I worked with a journalist named Bart Spellers from the Netherlands, who was writing an article about the Coca-Cola controversy in India. He wanted to visit the disputed Coke sites across the country, including Mehdiganj near Varanasi. I assisted him in Varanasi as his local guide and translator. I was also eager for an opportunity to visit Mehdiganj again and speak directly with the people affected by Coca-Cola’s presence, so I was glad to take this job. I accompanied Bart to Mehdiganj and arranged interviews with Nandlal Master, a few plant employees, the union leader, several women, and local farmers.

Bart wasn’t interested in conducting too many interviews—he preferred speaking to a smaller group of the right people, since he had limited time in Varanasi. I was honestly surprised to learn how little time he had allocated for this work. Given that his article was on such a controversial subject, I felt he should have spent more time in Benares to gain a deeper understanding. Still, I think he did a good job overall, because he focused on meaningful conversations with key voices.

Although I was already familiar with the issue, I was still taken aback when I spoke with the people of Mehdiganj. I had hoped the situation might have improved over the past few years, but I quickly realized it was just as bad as when I first visited four years ago. The anger against Coca-Cola and the government was still intense. Residents told us that Coca-Cola was directly responsible for the depletion of groundwater in the area, while the government continued to turn a blind eye.

They said the situation had been deteriorating year by year. Last year, rainfall was below average, yet Coca-Cola’s market share in India had grown—naturally putting even more pressure on already scarce groundwater. Nandlal Master explained that a committee formed by the Prime Minister’s Office had completed a study of the issue and submitted its report, but the findings had not been made public. This seemed strange to me.

Why not release the report if the study is already finished? According to Nandlal, he had filed an RTI request to obtain a copy. The concerned department replied that the district magistrate had been instructed to provide him with the report. That is fine, but it still raises questions: why hide it in the first place? Why wasn’t the media informed? This silence from both the government and Coca-Cola only adds to the suspicion surrounding the issue.

For now, nothing has changed. People continue to struggle, and we are left with unanswered questions. Hopefully, one day, transparency and accountability will prevail—but when, no one can say.

Finally, Bart’s article was published here:
Coca-Cola zuigt de grond leeg