Tag Archives: disco

Disco in Varanasi

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New Year’s Eve at Agni Disco, Varanasi

Usually, I go out with my friends to celebrate New Year, but this year I couldn’t because my friends were not organized. I thought, why not explore something new in Varanasi? That’s when I remembered a disco called Agni, which had opened the previous year. I had only heard about it but didn’t know its exact location. I asked my friends, but they didn’t know either. Finally, I took my bike and went searching for it on the evening of the 31st. I reached a bar, asked about the disco, and fortunately, they knew the address.

When I first went there, they told me the timings – open from 12 to 4 in the afternoon and again from 8 to 11 in the evening. They asked me to return at 8 o’clock. Later, I went back with a friend around 9, only to find out that they were allowing couples only. I was really disappointed. I asked if there was any chance later in the night, and they told me to come back after an hour. So, my friend and I went to a nearby alcohol shop, had a beer, and then returned. Luckily, this time they allowed me in.

The entry fee was Rs. 1000 for couples and Rs. 700 for single men like me, while entry was free for girls. The ticket included two beers, but inside they gave only two small glasses instead of a bottle or a can. I had been to several discos and nightclubs in bigger Indian cities before, but this was my first disco experience in Varanasi – and it turned out to be really interesting.

I noticed a few differences compared to discos in big cities. Usually, discos in metros serve good-quality alcohol and have plenty of stock, but here the options were very limited. Most of the alcohol was either cheap, very common, or just lower middle-quality brands – nothing like what I’d seen elsewhere. Another big difference was the music. In Varanasi’s disco, they played only Bollywood songs. Honestly, I enjoyed it because I understand and like Bollywood more than Western music, but it surprised me since in big cities I rarely see discos playing Indian pop or Bollywood.

The crowd was also different. Discos in big cities usually have at least 100 people even on normal days, but here on New Year’s Eve there were hardly 50 people. Most were young boys, though a few girls were also there. Varanasi is a very male-dominated city, and you rarely see girls in short skirts or sleeveless clothes. But at Agni, for the first time in my life, I saw girls in short skirts, drinking, and smoking – something very rare to see in Varanasi. Boys and girls were dancing together, away from their families.

Perhaps many of them were not locals. Varanasi attracts students from all over India, many of whom live in hostels, so I think they were hostel students enjoying their freedom. It’s hard for me to imagine local parents in Varanasi allowing their daughters to go to a disco with male friends. Still, I liked seeing them together. I was also curious about women’s safety at the disco, and after spending nearly three hours there, it seemed to be safe for women as well.

Surprisingly, I even saw a few families with kids. Normally the disco closes at 11 pm, but because it was New Year’s Eve, they stayed open until 1 am. Overall, it was a very nice and memorable experience. I enjoyed it a lot and would definitely like to visit again on regular days with my friends or even family.

Happy New Year 2011!

Chennai Gay Pride 2010

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Chennai Gay Pride – June 27

It was Chennai Gay Pride yesterday, on the 27th of June, and I went to attend the festival. The event wasn’t as large as I had expected, but it was still significant enough to attract attention from the local community and raise awareness about LGBTQ+ issues. I was expecting at least 1,000–2,000 participants, but the turnout was closer to 400–500. The parade began near the Labor Statue at Marina Beach at 5 PM and lasted for over an hour. It was organized with the support of several organizations working for LGBTQ+ rights in Chennai, with Shakti Center being one of the most prominent names involved.

Foreign participants

The Parade Atmosphere

The participants seemed genuinely happy and energetic, especially those from the LGBTQ+ community. Unlike the Delhi and Mumbai Pride parades, which had loud music and people dancing, Chennai Pride didn’t feature music. Still, participants sang songs in Tamil (which I couldn’t understand), laughed, danced, and hugged each other with joy. I noticed that there were fewer lesbian couples compared to Delhi and Mumbai, and overall the atmosphere felt a little less open. In Delhi and Mumbai, many participants walked hand in hand with their partners, making their relationships visible. In Chennai, however, most people seemed more reserved, perhaps reflecting the city’s more conservative, religious outlook.

People from the organizing committee

Conversations with Organizers

I spoke with one of the organizers who told me that last year’s parade had more people, but many were outside supporters. This year, though the crowd was smaller, more members of the community itself participated—which he considered an important step forward. Since the parade took place at Marina Beach, a popular weekend spot, thousands of locals watched. I handed out pamphlets and masks to curious onlookers. Interestingly, the use of masks was much higher here compared to Delhi and Mumbai. Some participants even wore two or three masks at once to completely cover their faces. When I asked them why, they explained that Chennai is still very conservative, and they didn’t want to risk being recognized.

There were families also

Attitudes and Challenges

Many participants expressed concern about how society perceives them. Some said, “If people see us in the parade, they’ll think we’re gay too.” This showed how stigma and fear of judgment still run deep here. I also spoke to Mr. Annirudhan Vasudevan, one of the parade organizers. He admitted that while the Delhi High Court’s decision to decriminalize same-sex relations had brought some change, it wasn’t enough to transform society. He said, “At least people are talking about it now. They know that something called the LGBTQ community exists and that we too have rights.”

I also think so

Annirudhan stressed that discrimination is widespread across India, and the community needs legal protection, medical care, and equal rights. He also highlighted the tragic case of Prof. Srinivas Siras from Aligarh Muslim University, who was suspended after being filmed in a private moment with a same-sex partner. The humiliation pushed him to take his own life, despite homosexuality being legal. This conversation made me realize how much more progress is needed—not just in laws, but in changing public attitudes.

Mr. Annirudh

The Pride Party

The night before the parade, there was a party at a four-star boutique hotel, Le Waterina, at Kotivakkam Beach. It was the most expensive Pride party I’d attended in India. Entry in Delhi was free, and in Mumbai it was ₹500 with reasonably priced drinks. In Chennai, the entry was ₹500, but drinks were very costly. At the party, I met locals who didn’t even know about the parade but had been invited to the event via SMS. Some hesitated to talk about the parade, reflecting again how cautious people are about revealing their identity. Still, I saw many of them at the parade the next day. One highlight of the party was a male go-go dancer—a first for me. Dressed in shorts and later removing his T-shirt, he performed for over an hour, and the crowd went wild. His presence added a new level of excitement to the celebration.

Go-Go dancer at teh party

Final Thoughts

Despite the challenges, I was glad to be part of Chennai Pride. The event showed both the struggles and the resilience of the community here. I hope that with time, Chennai Pride will grow larger, attract more supporters, and become more open—just like in Delhi and Mumbai. One thing is clear: LGBTQ+ rights will not advance without support from allies. It is our responsibility, as straight people, to stand with the community and help create a more equal world.

My friends and I

More Pics:

https://photos.app.goo.gl/wHjjzmTWsTcVn2xVA

Mumbai Gay Pride 2009

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I attended Mumbai Gay Pride on August 16th. This date was chosen because the organizers of the event, from the gay community, decided to celebrate their freedom one day after India’s Independence Day on August 15th. They felt that while India gained freedom on that day, the gay community had yet to achieve their own freedom. The event was organized by an NGO called Humsafar, which works with the gay community in Mumbai. I had already been in touch with Humsafar about my project, and they were very welcoming. Although I was in Gwalior for training, I took a 4-day leave and flew to Mumbai, arriving on the night of the 14th.

 

I had attended this year’s Delhi Pride on June 26th and missed having a video camera. This time, I arranged for one to record the Mumbai Gay Pride. I asked my friend Yogesh, who works in Bollywood, to help me get a camera, and he provided everything I needed. On the 16th, I went to Humsafar with a cameraman and a friend from the US named Ryan, whom I had invited to join me at Mumbai Pride. My goals were to cover the parade preparations, interview a few people at Humsafar and at the parade, participate in the event, enjoy the party, and make new contacts for future collaborations.

I was scheduled to start interviews at Humsafar at noon, but upon arrival, I found several media personnel already interviewing their team. However, they arranged for someone to show me around their office, which was impressive. They had an HIV and AIDS testing center, which I had not seen in other NGOs before. The Humsafar representative took me to the second floor where preparations for the next day’s parade were underway. About 20 people, including some hijras, were practicing dances. They had a drummer playing Punjabi dhol and a large sound system. I was surprised to see them practicing traditional hijra dance.

I spent some time observing the preparations; the enthusiasm and hard work of the performers were evident. The performers were either homosexuals or hijras who sought assistance from Humsafar. The office representative informed me that the CEO of Humsafar, Mr. Vivek Raj Anand, had just arrived and offered me the opportunity to interview him. I felt fortunate to have a 15-minute interview with him, during which he demonstrated his deep knowledge and commitment to the issues.

I believe the gay community has always existed in India, but many view it as a foreign concept. Therefore, when interviewing people about gay culture, I ask about its history in India and its presence in Hindu religious texts. I believe that understanding its historical and religious context can make it easier for people to accept and support it. My goal was to interview people and share these interviews online. I conducted the interviews in Hindi to ensure that people in India could understand them. During the interviews, one interviewee shared stories from the Ramayana and other Hindu texts that indicated the presence of gay culture even during Ram’s time.

He discussed the challenges he faced, societal discrimination, and his hopes for the future. It was enlightening to learn about the history of gay culture in India, especially within Hinduism. Mr. Anand expressed interest in having me work with the MSM (men who have sex with men) community in Benares. He offered to help with funding or projects through the UP government, which was something I was eager to pursue. However, he mentioned that Humsafar does not operate outside Mumbai and Thane districts. They could provide support such as funding or training but would not extend their work beyond these areas.

Since my NGO, Sanjeevani Booti, was not yet registered under section 12A, I would not be able to collaborate with him soon. However, Sanjeevani Booti has now completed its first year, so I can apply for this registration. Mr. Anand also mentioned his gratitude to Baba Ramdev on behalf of the gay community. Baba Ramdev challenged the Delhi High Court’s judgment on Section 377 in the Supreme Court of India. Mr. Anand believed the Supreme Court would soon rule in favor of the gay community, leading to equal rights. I share his appreciation for Baba Ramdev’s efforts.

I interviewed Mr. Anand, the manager of Humsafar, one bisexual individual, two hijras, and a few gay men. It was a valuable experience hearing their stories. Despite their different backgrounds, they faced similar issues, primarily discrimination. The Humsafar manager shared his struggle to obtain a passport with a gender marker reflecting his identity as a female or hijra. Government officials were unfamiliar with the concept of transgender identities, and he had sued the government over this issue. He is currently preparing for a gender change operation but faces obstacles due to the lack of a passport.

I also interviewed a Muslim gay man with two hijras. This was my first interview with a Muslim gay individual. He shared that his family would never accept his desire to marry a man, leaving him with the choice to either escape or remain unmarried. The hijras provided fascinating insights into their community, revealing that there are two types of hijras, each with different customs and levels of respect. I had always been confused about the distinction between “hijra” and “gay.” The hijras explained that educated people use the term “gay,” while uneducated people use “hijra.” They also discussed the challenges faced by the hijra community in India, which mirrored those faced by others I interviewed.

They mentioned the existence of two types of hijras: those who marry a hijra goddess and can live with their families, and those who bless and dance at weddings. One of the bisexual interviewees was a male sex worker. It was my first encounter with a male sex worker, and our conversation was eye-opening. He recounted his experiences and challenges, including an amusing story about mistakenly offering condoms to a policeman. The first day focused on observing preparations and conducting interviews at Humsafar. After finishing the interviews, we waited for an auto-rickshaw when I met Sourendra, a 25-26-year-old who was also gay and frequented Humsafar. We went to a litti-chokha (a famous Bihari food) party with my friend and interviewed Sourendra over dinner at 1 a.m.

I regretted bringing Sourendra to the party because his presence attracted unwanted attention from other guests. Despite the discomfort, Sourendra was open and energetic, discussing his experiences with discrimination and societal expectations. He shared an intriguing story about the existence of gays and hijras during Krishna’s time, which I had never heard before. After the parade, my friend Bijay took me to a renowned restaurant near August Kranti Marg. Following a few beers, we went to Bijay’s hotel and later to a party at a disco. The Mumbai party was distinct from the Delhi party, being organized by participants rather than the parade organizers.

Despite the Rs. 500 entry fee, the party was lively and had a larger turnout, including more lesbian couples. I drank too much and got drunk, witnessing many gay couples showing affection. The Mumbai Gay Pride seemed more organized compared to Delhi’s. There was a van with banners, posters, masks, and t-shirts, though the t-shirts sold out quickly. They also distributed bottled water and had volunteers collecting trash, making it a cleaner event. Many people watched the parade from their balconies, and some joined spontaneously. The Mumbai parade featured more transgenders and hijras than Delhi’s, with a group performing traditional hijra dance.

The parade ended at August Kranti Marg with speeches from social workers and NGO members about gay rights and future plans. I also interviewed a gay couple at the beach nearby. Regarding Section 377’s repeal, I found that everyone I spoke to was happy about it. A participant explained that such laws are crucial for societal change, and while Section 377 did not directly impact gay culture, it altered societal attitudes over time. With its repeal, there is hope for equal rights in the future, even if it may take decades. After the parade, Bijay and I went to a disco party. The Mumbai party, organized by participants, had a higher turnout and was different from Delhi’s.

Although I had to leave early for a 6 a.m. flight back to Bhopal, the party was memorable. Ryan helped me pack and get to the airport. Despite the craziness, I thoroughly enjoyed the trip, meeting new people, learning about their experiences, and establishing connections with Humsafar. They have invited me to the parade next year, and I plan to attend. My friend Sanjay, who initially thought my project was crazy, changed his perspective after hearing the interviews. He now supports equal rights for gays.

The stories I shared about gay culture in Hindu religion helped shift his view. I believe that if more people learn about the historical presence of gays in Hindu culture, acceptance will grow. The main issue behind discrimination against gays in India is a communication gap, especially regarding sex practices, compounded by the 150 years of Section 377. This law deeply affected societal attitudes, but historically, gay practices were part of Hindu culture. The British altered everything, and as we slowly address the issues they left behind, I hope we can also overcome this outdated system.

—

Delhi Gay Pride 2009 – afterparty

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Megan and Adam were running late, so I told them to head off while I stayed behind for the party. I wandered around and eventually stopped at a bus stop, where I sat for a while. Two people, who seemed to be from rural areas, came and sat next to me. It appeared that they had also witnessed the parade and were discussing it. One of them was visibly angry about the parade. He was cursing the government and the event organizers, expressing his frustration that people were openly mocking Indian culture and that the government was allowing it.

His remarks suggested he hadn’t explored the historical and cultural aspects of Indian traditions. For instance, the *Ramayana* includes references to hijras with practices similar to those of modern gays, the *Kamasutra* discusses homosexuality, and the temples at Khajuraho feature numerous sculptures depicting same-sex relations. It seemed clear that his views were influenced by a limited understanding of Indian cultural and historical context. I haven’t visited Khajuraho, but I have read the Ramayana and looked at the Kamasutra. From these sources, it seems that India has a very old gay culture, which was accepted in society but became criminalized by the British.

After spending an hour wandering around, I returned to the place where the bus was supposed to start from. There, I met a 20-year-old student from Delhi University. I was sitting near the bus when he came over and sat next to me. He said that attending the parade had made him feel more confident and open. He mentioned that he had been shy before the parade, but the experience had helped him overcome his shyness and embrace his identity with greater assurance. He wanted to talk to me about a problem he was having with his boyfriend.

He said that his boyfriend had stopped communicating with him and had slapped him a few months ago in front of his friends. He was very upset about this and sought my advice. Despite the situation, he mentioned that his boyfriend used to love him a lot, and he found it hard to believe that they could ever break up. He was deeply in love with him. I advised him to wait a while, keep trying to contact his boyfriend, and see how things developed. He seemed quite relieved and happy to hear that he should make an effort to stay in touch.

I asked him if he had told his parents about his boyfriend, and he said no, because he was afraid they would be angry if they found out. I then asked if he would like to marry his boyfriend, and he said that’s what he wanted. When I inquired whether he thought his parents would ever accept him marrying a man, he was silent for a moment and then said no. I also asked if his friends knew about his boyfriend, and he said they did, but only a few were supportive. Most of his friends just made fun of him.

He sought my advice on how to dress to look attractive at the party. He had an extra sleeveless t-shirt that he had bought specifically for the occasion, and he also had a piece of cloth that he wanted to wrap around his waist to enhance his look. Although I’m not a fashion expert, I did my best to help him look his best. As I spoke with him, I wondered what might happen if he were forced into a marriage with a woman. He had no need to marry someone of the opposite sex, and it would be detrimental for both him and his potential bride. Many homosexual individuals in India are coerced into such marriages, which seems like a grave injustice to me.

I also noticed something interesting: many homosexual individuals were calling each other by feminine or humorous names, such as using the word “randi” (slut). I didn’t quite understand why they did this. While hijras often adopt feminine names, homosexuals usually don’t, but it seemed that they enjoyed using these names among themselves. Additionally, I found it notable that homosexuals were making fun of hijras. On the bus ride to the party, there were quite a few hijras on board as well.

Hijras are known for their distinctive clapping and hijra songs. All the hijras on the bus were singing their songs and clapping in their traditional style. However, a group of homosexual individuals being interviewed on the bus continuously mocked the hijras. They would say things like, “Oh my God! Where did these hijras come from, these randis…” At one point, a guy even stood up and loudly asked if anyone had a one-rupee coin to give to the “randi hijras,” so they would stop clapping and singing. Although there was no malice intended, it was clear that they were making fun of the hijras. Despite this, everyone seemed to be in good spirits, and it was a fun ride overall.

I really enjoyed that bus ride and will never forget it. The atmosphere was vibrant—people were laughing, singing, hugging each other, and playfully teasing one another. It was so much fun. Eventually, the bus stopped, and we arrived at M Lounge Bar in Sector 15, Noida. I had expected it to be a place with just some food, drinks, and conversation, but it turned out to be much more than I imagined. In fact, it was a disco. As soon as I stepped in, everything I saw was completely new to me, as I had never been to a disco before.

People were dancing, drinking, hugging, and kissing—I had never seen anything like it before. There was a bar in the disco, and I decided to have a drink, but I didn’t realize how expensive everything would be. While entrance was free for parade participants, the drinks, food, and cigarettes were quite costly. I had a shot of whiskey and a bottle of beer, but I still wanted more because the atmosphere was so thrilling. I was having a fantastic time. Finally, I had to leave the disco to buy some alcohol from a shop. Before I did, I ran into the organizer, Mr. Amit Agrawal, and chatted with him for a while.

He was too drunk to have a meaningful conversation, so he directed me to speak with one of the other organizers, a 25-year-old student. He mentioned that he was also gay. When I asked if he had informed his family, he said, “No.” I inquired whether he thought his parents would approve of him marrying his boyfriend, and he said he wasn’t sure. However, he was certain that he wouldn’t want to marry a girl. He mentioned that they had organized the parade without any financial assistance from NGOs, institutions, or charities. The entire event was funded by a group of gays, who had contributed their own money to make it happen.

He was quite intoxicated and gave me his mobile number, asking me to call him the next day for further discussion. After our conversation, I returned to the disco, where the party was in full swing. Everything I saw there was entirely new to me. I saw many gay couples kissing, hugging, and dancing together. One couple, with a 60+ year-old man and a 20-year-old, stood out—they had the longest kiss I’ve ever seen, lasting for about two hours. There were also hijras with their partners, and I observed them kissing as well. Additionally, a few lesbian couples were present.

It was clear that the regular patrons of the disco were taken aback; they would sit in a corner, watching the scene with shocked and curious expressions. It was evident they had never witnessed anything like this before. I don’t think any of the regular patrons danced that night; they were simply observing what was happening. It was such a fun experience. At first, it felt a bit strange and I was shocked, much like the other regulars, but after a few minutes, everything seemed normal. I felt like everyone was just enjoying themselves, and the most important thing was that they were happy. The sense of freedom and joy was palpable, and it was truly awesome to witness.

It was amusing when one of the guys came up to me, started dancing, and touched my butt. I wasn’t sure how to react at first, but after a few seconds, he left me and joined someone else. I appreciated how he respected my feelings, and I think we should extend the same respect to others. None of the LGBTQ+ individuals made fun of me, insulted me, or tried to disturb me because I was straight. I don’t understand why straight people often make fun of or insult LGBTQ+ individuals. Why can’t straight people respect gay people’s feelings in the same way they expect their own feelings to be respected?
Now that the party was over, I headed back home. I really enjoyed the party—it was an incredibly fun night. Participating in and supporting the parade, along with the exciting party, felt like one of the best things I had ever done for myself. I was scheduled to talk with two members of the organizing committee the next morning, and I was looking forward to it. However, when I called them, both said they had drunk too much the previous night and just wanted to sleep. As a result, I couldn’t speak with them. I will try to talk with them the next time I visit Delhi.
Mr. Amit had asked me to help organize a Gay Pride Parade in Benares as well, but I’m unsure if the city is ready for such an event. Overall, my experience was fantastic, and I genuinely enjoyed participating in the parade. I witnessed the struggles faced by the gay community in India, listened to their concerns, and spoke with many of them. Ultimately, I believe that they deserve equal rights—equal rights in all aspects of life and social acceptance. Although I don’t know how long it will take for them to achieve equal rights in India, it is clear that gaining social acceptance will be a long and challenging process.
The gay community exists everywhere in the world, though it may be hidden in some places due to social pressure and more visible in others due to increased awareness, education, and liberalization. I recently read a newspaper article about an NGO working with the gay community in Varanasi. The article mentioned that the NGO was assisting 1,500 gay individuals in the city. However, I believe this number is an underestimate. The actual number is likely much higher, as many gay people choose not to make their relationships public due to societal non-acceptance.
The gay community exists everywhere in the world, though it may be hidden in some places due to social pressure and more visible in others due to increased awareness, education, and liberalization. I recently read a newspaper article about an NGO working with the gay community in Varanasi. The article mentioned that the NGO was assisting 1,500 gay individuals in the city. However, I believe this number is an underestimate. The actual number is likely much higher, as many gay people choose not to make their relationships public due to societal non-acceptance.
Gay culture is private, and it’s unreasonable to assume we should know or judge what happens behind closed doors. Such thoughts are misguided. Outside of private spaces, everyone—whether homosexual or straight—engages in similar activities. When a person is born in India, they are entitled to basic human rights, including freedom of speech, freedom of thought, and equal rights. Gay culture represents a different perspective, nothing more, and everyone has the right to their own beliefs and ways of living.
Some people prefer relationships with the opposite sex, while others are attracted to the same sex. Just as those who are attracted to the opposite sex deserve to pursue their relationships freely, so too should those who are attracted to the same sex. If we advocate for equal rights, then gay individuals should be afforded the same rights as everyone else on this planet. Imagine being forcibly married to someone of the same sex; it would be an incredibly difficult situation if you were not inclined toward that relationship. The same consideration should be applied to everyone who views homosexuality as abnormal. It’s worth reflecting on.